I've been reading this great new book called The Dynamic Laws of Prosperity by Catherine Ponder. It has this one exercise where you write about things from your past and present that you wished happened or could have happened a different way. Then you can also write out how you wish things to happen in your future.

I did the past and present part of the exercise on a break at work and afterwards, I felt like a big burden had been lifted from my shoulders. I don't have a lot of regrets in my life, not big ones anyway, but there a few things I do regret. I also wrote down incidents I had with other people that I wished had gone a different way and I got a few insights into why certain people might have acted the way they did. I felt very compassionate even for the people who I thought wrecked havoc on my life.

What else. I decided I needed more underwear for my upcoming trip, so I went to Victoria's Secret again. I was actually standing in line with my purchases, when I noticed the cashier ringing up a bra for a woman that cost only $10. Like a mermaid siren calling to a love starved sailor man, I was drawn back to the sales bins of underwear. And like the sailor, my hopes of finding anything in my size and in a colour I wanted was once again dashed brutally on the rocks of nothingness.

What is it about bins of sale items that make me want to dig through judiciously hoping against hope of finding something that fits in a color I like? You can go to 10 different stores and look through all their sale racks and bins and maybe find one thing you like after hours of hours of digging and combing through the ugliest pieces of clothing imaginable. There's a reason why the Victoria's Secret sales bins are full of thong underwear. NOBODY WEARS THEM! Despite what the media may be telling you, nobody wears butt floss. The sales bins and racks at any underwear department are proof of this widely known fact.

The other thing to know about shopping at underwear sales is all the big sizes are gone, which leads me to conclude that most women in America and in the SF Bay Area have huge rears! The small and medium bins are full of underwear in great colours. The large and extra large bins are full of thongs and other freaky coloured underwear. Why they make underwear in freaky colours is a mystery to me. The stuff never sold when it first came out and it's certainly not going to sell now when it's dirt cheap. Isn't it nice to know though, that most women do have beauty standards for their underwear.

I wish I could date my marina hottie boy. He's just so cute. But I'm so clueless how to even attract a guy like him. I think he might have been a little interested before when we first me and then I blew it and now we're just friends. I tried to get over him and I thought I was succeeding, but the guy just haunts my mind. He is like so amazing, so cute and so smart. Maybe we have some kind of past life/soul connection or something, because this crush is just way too strong to be an ordinary crush.

But I'm so clueless how to get a guy interested in me if he doesn't show interest right away or if he did, I missed my window of opportunity. How do you I get the guy to be interested in me again.

We're at least friends so I think there's hope. If I get my act together, lose a few pounds, buy some pushup bras and start wearing low tops, because he likes women that show their assets. I would love to just date him at least for 90 days just to see if we're compatible at all, if the's the fantasy man I've made him out to be in my mind.

I saw Lagaan on Sunday and I loved it. God, I love Bollywood movies and this one was a doozy and a half. A 30's musical in an isolated indian village complete with singing and beautiful people. The star of the indian epic looks like the Krishna portrayed in all the posters you see at hippie shops and at indian grocery stores. Which fits just right, since the village has a Krishna and Radha temple and there's even a Krishna and Radha dance.

Any spiritual chick worth her salt fantasizes, thinks actually, that she was a reincarnated Gopi girl who sat at Krishna's feet. At least, all my friends did. I never did, but that's another story.

The movie credits said it was a joint Indian and Brittish production. Which is interesting, since the Brits were played so one-dimensional and mean. I was watching the movie the movie and every time the Brits were mean to people, I was chanting Bande Materam, which was the chant used during the Ghandi revolution to free India from Brit colonial rule. Bande Materam which means Mother I bow to Thee, the mother being Mother India. That and my vague memories of the Indian national anthem going through my head. You almost want to yell at the screen, see, this is a perfect example of white people colonialism at its worst. And the Brits paid for their meaness too. Today, the Indians rule the cricket world and the Brits are horrible at it.

I loved the music. I think I'm going to have to try to get the soundtrack for it. I might even have track down the videos/DVD for this movie. It was that good.

And the cricket. Well, at least I now understand cricket. It's kind of like baseball in an odd way and I'm sure baseball has its roots in cricket. You bowl or pitch, you bat, and you score runs, except the Brits do it all wearing whites just like in tennis.

And the dance numbers. They were a riot. The whole movie was entertaining. You never see anything that campy, fun and overly dramatic in Hollywood cinema today. We need more Bollywood to come to America.

Then I saw Mulholland Drive. God, I love David Lynch. He is so strange and wonderful. This movie made me want to go back and rewatch all of David Lynch's other movies because images from his other movies are repeated in this one. This movie was one of the most thought provoking movies I've ever seen in my life. I would put this movie up there with Bulworth, another movie which I totally loved. I wish I'd seen this movie in the big screen. I mean, Being John Malcovich was child's play compared to Mulholland Drive.

David Lynch is so spooky and scary and I love how he weaves all his various scenes together to make one cohesive whole. The movie got kind of odd after the woman opened the blue box and I was like "what the hell just happened". But then while lying in bed, I got it. The last scene of the movie is the blue haired woman saying "Silencio" which is that weird theatre of the absurd that was in the movie. I mean, only in LA, will you even see such existential bullshit being done.

At Silencio, the announcer guy keeps saying that what you're seeing isn't real. Which is actually kind of funny in a movie, which also not real and fiction. So it's like, it's a fiction within a ficiton, within a fiction, within a fiction of someone's mind. BRILLIANT!

What's real in the movie? Who knows? Does it matter? It's a movie whose very nature is to tell a lie and not to tell the truth. But we sit there in the audience expecting to see truth. Why? It's movie, not a documentary. The movie is not supposed to tell the truth, it's supposed to lie, it's supposed to stretch the boundaries of reality further, further than real life ever could. So in a cosmically absurd way, it doesn't matter that the story doesn't make sense, especially the beginning, maybe even the whole thing.

I'm going to have read reviews of this movie just to see what other critics have had to say.

I finally got around to seeing Star Wars, going so far as to seeing it at a digitial theatre, one of only two in San Francisco proper. I think there maybe one more digital theatre and it's in Marin near Lucas Ranch.

First off, seeing the move on a digital screen was amazing, especially since George Lucas shot the movie in digital. The sreen is so huge and the sound is great. There's just one problem. The screen is almost too big and there's so much going on in the whole frame that you have to tell yourself to check out the whole screen once in awhile instead of just focusing on the middle. Then sometimes, something on the side would catch my eye and I would stop paying attention to what was happening in the middle. Maybe the answer is to sit in the last row so you're further away? We sat in the middle.

Secondly, what a familiar sight the whole Star Wars logo is and that blaringly loud theme music. I jumped out of my seat and my friend Kim was laughing at me. Honestly, that opening note is so loud it's like a thunderclap. And what about the opening where they tell you what's going on. How familiar is that and how paradoied is that set up too.

The special effects were fantastic, although I couldn't help but flashback to all those making of star wars documentaries and picturing those tiny scale replicas Plus, with the advent of computers, I spent the whole time wondering what's real and what's computer generated.

And some of those backdrops were so beautiful, although I couldn't help but think some of the prettier scenes looked like something out of Thomas Kinkade painting, especially the ones at the lake. Maybe George Lucas has been spending time at the Thomas Kinkade store in Marin, which I think is now out of business. My friend guessed the lake site was the Lake Cuomo area in Italy and she guessed right because it was in the credits. I knew it was a shot from some Italian vista. Aren't all romantic scenes, no matter what time and galaxy they're from shot in romantic Italy?

The actor playing Anakin Skywalker was not cute. He had those bulging eyes like Susan Sarandon. Ewan Macgregor is definitely the better looking of the two. And Yoda too. Christopher Lee was great as always. The guy makes such a great villian. He was great in The Lord of the Rings too, only this time he even got to fight with a light saber. The old guy can definitely still move.

Rachel Portman was cute and I loved all her outfits and that whole no bra look. She's got a teenage girl's body and not really curvy enough to be playing a mid 20 something, which I think is Padme's true age. And yes, the first time she greets Anakin, she does sound like a Valley Girl from Naboo and not a princess or a senator. But you can see shades of Princess Leia in her daringness and her ability and willingness to fight.

And what about that Bambi scene, with Anakin and his dying mother. Was George Lucas taking a cue from Disney Land? Very Freudian. I'm sure there will be a ton of high school and college essays written about that scene. I think even Steven Spielberg had a Bambi and his dying mother scene in one of his movies, but I can't remember which one.

Then there was the execution scene which was right out of Russell Crowe's Gladiator. It's nice to know some of my favorite movies were echoed in Star Wars. My friend said it was more like a bull fight scene, except this time with space creature bulls. Even Anakin got to do the cowboy thing when he tamed the crazy creature with the horn.

And what about Bobba Fett? Wasn' t he just the cutest little kid? Was there some mother of a serial killer or other deranged criminal in the audience being reminded of her cute little son and what he grew up to be.

Then the last scene was like right out of Romeo and Juliet being married by the friar in the garden. How romantic!

It's like George Lucas tapped on everybody' s collective consciousness and gave it all back to aka Star Wars. Is that why the Star Wars series is so popular?

I liked the parallels that I saw in Attack of the Clones with the three previous Star Wars.

Anakin and Padme's romance mirrors Leia's and Han Solo's romance. Both mother and daughter had a thing for rebel types I guess.

Anakin and Luke, both liking to fix things, both on the desert planet, both disobeying their Jedi masters to help out their friends.

I'm sure there more but I just don't remember them right now.

Then the final shot at the end of the movie is the all the clones and they're playing the Empire theme song. You know the old dude senator is an evil thing. Why else would he be encouraging Anakin like that, making him think he's the next best thing to Yoda. The guy's got to be evil. Nobody is ever going to be better than Yoda!

But George Lucas did get the whole how you turn to dark side of the force right. My meditation teacher even talked about it. Doubt is the first thing. Doubt leads to distrust god and question what's happening all around you. You start to get mad a god, the force when events go bad, because you don't trust that it's happening for the good. Anakin definitely had alot of doubt in his heart when his mother died. Doubt opens the door to you thinking you know better than god, then the force, that you and not god, the force is the master of the universe. Doubt is the cause of all evil. I think Yoda would say a Jedi does not doubt the Force, a Jedi has Buddha like attachment and is a servant of god, unconditionally obeying and surrending to everything that is happening around him. In martial arts, they teach you that it is better to yield to an opponent than to fight him, because when you put up resistance, you lose your balance. You yield then your opponent is off balance then you strike.

Then there's that whole pivotal scene where Anakin and OB1 are in the cave with evil Count Dokuu. If Anakin hadn't charged, the whole Stars Wars series would have ended right then and there. No Darth Vader. But because Anakin was arrogant and thougtht he was stronger than the old dude, he rushed and was blasted. A warrior does not react out of anger or arrogance. There will always be someone out there stronger than you are. A warrior can only winning by cunning and by his own intelligence. Anakin has yet to learn these things.

But you know, Anakin is like a typical teenage boy, full of raging hormones. Just think the whole balance of power in the Star Wars universe was thrown off because of the antics of an arrogant, frat boy type, teenage boy. I'm sure there's another story like this around, but I can't think of one right now.

Now the question remains, how does George Lucas wrap up the story. How does Anakin finally turn towards the dark side. The seed of doubt is alreading inside him. Doubt opens a door to all the evil stuff like anger, revenge, hatred. I mean Anakin already did the slaughter the whole village thing, so there's definitely going to be guilt for that. And you know if you can slaughter the a whole village, why not entire civilizations, why not the whole universe. Is it true when they say all it takes it one baby step?

Then how is George Lucas going to resolve Padme getting pregnant? Darth Vader did not know he had offspring. There will have to be a separation between the hero and heroine. And how long before Padme gets pregnant? She is a virgin I think. Will it be the first night or will several months or a couple years pass. I say, the next installment of the story starts shortly after this story ended, while Anakin has all those raging teenage hormones running his brain. Anakin will be not be allowed to grow up and mature.

What about the plans for the Death Star? That doesn't come till years later, but in this installment you already see the plans for it.

I almost want to see the movie again, maybe in a regular theatre to see if digital really makes a difference. I saw Spiderman twice, I should at least see Attack of the Clones twice.