There are consequences to everything you do in life, even the good things that you do for yourself. Earlier this year, I started seeing a chiropractor/healer in Berkeley. He corrected many balances that he saw in my body. Afterwards, he told me that my energy level was 92% and he was very amazed at my level. When I asked him why, he said that most people have an energy level of 80%. At the time, I didn't think much about what he said and did not think about what effect this added energy would have on my life.
I just received an email from a very good friend of mine, which said that I am hard to deal with because my energy is too high. My friend says she is in a tired depressive state, and she can't communicate with me because of my high energy.
I kind of feel bad, because I didn't know she was depressed, but at the same time I'm like I love my new energized state. I worked very hard and spent a ton of money to have an energy level at 92%. I can't help that my energy is way too high. Isn't that the point of life, to go through it with your hair on fire, living larger than life, having way too much fun, and having enough energy to do all things you dream of doing? That's how I view life.
I mean, sure I get depressed, but my depressive states don't last too long. I've been way too proactive in my life about reducing my level of misery. I've spent way too much money, and spent countless hours to acquire tools, books, tips, techniques to get me out of my depressive states. I've been in and out therapy since I was 21 years old, have been to every type of healer all over the country, all in pursuit of that seemingly impossible high energy, loving life state. I can't be depressed. I've spent way too much time and money so I wouldn't ever be depressed, and if I was depressed, it wouldn't last more than a couple of days.
I love my life. I wouldn't trade my life for anyone else's. Sure things can be improved, because there's always room for transformation and improvement, but I really love my life. I feel blessed, loved, and most of all I feel grateful that I have the life I have. Because I know, things could be worse, way worse, and I thank god that 99.9% of the time I wake up still feeling like I live the life of Reilly. I wish everybody in the world could feel about their life the way I feel about mine. It's a trippy, cool feeling, way better than being on any drug I've ever taken, and I've taken quite a few drugs in my life so I should know.
It's probably so weird to feel this good about your own life, but I do. I know where I came from, I know what my past was like, I've seen what my future would have been like if I had made different choices in my life, and I'm so darn, darn grateful that I have the life I have, because I know that at any point in my life, I could have gone the other way. I really feel this. And most of the time, I marvel that I didn't go the other way, that I didn't end up a drug addict, that I'm not homeless and tricking for a living, and that I'm not dead. I know that the only thing that separates me and the people who are at serious risk is the choice I made a every moment in life. At every moment in your life you have a choice, and your future always depends on that one choice, and your life depends on a series of moments and series of choices that you've made. It's always that one choice. And for whatever reason, maybe because it's really true that god takes care of fools and idiots, I didn't make that one choice which would have ultimately led to a horrible future.
And it's not that my childhood or my life was really bad or anything, because I've met people who had it worse, way worse. I just honestly believe that the only thing that prevented me from having a less than ideal future, was that one choice I made, that I kept consistently making at every moment in my life.
Friday, September 06, 2002
Thursday, September 05, 2002
Correction to my post below. The book where I got the formula was "Dieting for Dummies". I checked my notes at home, and now I"m not even sure I wrote the formula down correctly. This is bad, but whatever I'm doing, at least I'm losing weight. I'll go back to the bookstore to check on the formula again this weekend. I hate it when I'm this spacey.
I was supposed to go to opening night football party tonight, but the car dealer called and said my car was ready. I thought for sure my car wouldn't be ready till Friday. I guess I could have picked up my car tomorrow, but I'm was tired of taking the bus. Oh well. I'm sure I don't need to go to a football party where I would probably have drunk too much beer and eaten way too many fattening snacks.
The 49ers are leading, and I'm happy about that. Watching football on TV brings back so many good memories for me. I grew up watching football, and it was a fun family event. Football is such a great game!
I was supposed to go to opening night football party tonight, but the car dealer called and said my car was ready. I thought for sure my car wouldn't be ready till Friday. I guess I could have picked up my car tomorrow, but I'm was tired of taking the bus. Oh well. I'm sure I don't need to go to a football party where I would probably have drunk too much beer and eaten way too many fattening snacks.
The 49ers are leading, and I'm happy about that. Watching football on TV brings back so many good memories for me. I grew up watching football, and it was a fun family event. Football is such a great game!
I am experimenting with my eating and exercising. This week I'm not exercising at all to see if it makes a difference to my weight loss. I weigh myself every morning when I get up, and from what I can tell, I'm still on track to lose two pounds by Saturday. I'll probably go back to walking 5-6 miles a day next week. I miss the time and quietness the walks afforded me. I think about things as I walk, and these sessions help to reduce my stress level.
My low calorie eating plan is going well. I'm not as strict as other low calorie eaters. I found a formula in the book Dieting Dummies, which I used to calculate how many calories I would need to eat to lose two pounds a week. You take your current weight and multiply that number by 10. Then you multiply your current weight by your activity level, the scale being 1 to 5. Then you mulitply your current weight by 1 to account for how many calories you burn for bodily functions. I think this is the formula. I have it in a spreadsheet at home, so I'll have to check if it's correct. The final amount is the number of calories you need to eat every day to maintain your current weight.
This the how I calculated my low calorie eating plan. My current weight was 168 pounds. 168 X 10 = 1,680. 168 X 4 = 672. I used 4 because I'm walking 5-6 miles a day. 168 X 1 = 168. These numbers together add up to 2,520. To lose two pounds a week, you subtract 1,000 from your total. You use 1,000 because you need burn or restrict 3,500 calories to lose one pound. To lose two pounds, you need burn or restrict 7,000 calories. 7,000 calories divided by 7 days is 1,000.
I'm looking at my formula, and I'm thinking something about it doesn't look right. I didn't buy the Fitness for Dummies book either, so if got it wrong, I'm like whatever. It's working.
Anyway, I try to eat 1,520 calories a day. Since I make my living as financial/reporting analyst, I track everything in an excel workbook complete with a graph and trend line to monitor my progress. Every day I input what I eat into a worksheet and the amount of calories per food item. Since I tend to eat the same foods, it's been relatively easy. I eat whatever I want, and there are no forbidden foods. But every day, my calorie total has to 1,520 or less.
Every day for work, I consume a breakfast of 300 or so calories. Breakfast is always the same. One Richard Schulze superfood shake with one cup of apple juice, one banana and water. I eat one packet of oatmeal sweetened with Equal, when I get work. I also drink two cups of coffee, with equal and soy milk or lactose free fat free milk.
Yes, I'm one of those people who drink soy milk. I was told I was lactose intolerant, so I drink soy milk or lactose free milk. I'm totally picky about my soy milk too, and only buy soy milk with less than 10 grams of carbos. There is no reason why soy milk should have more than 10 grams of carbos. If the soy milk does, then the manufacturer is putting lots of sugars into it, and there's no need to do that. I buy organic soy milk from a california grocery chain, not a health food store mind you, because they carry an organic soy milk brand with less than 2 grams of carbos. I used to only drink soy milk, but I'm experimenting with lactose free fat free milk for cereals.
For lunch, I usually have two cups of soup. I try to find a soup where one cup equals 100 calories or less. I also eat one serving of some kind of cracker or bread that is 100 calories or less. I also usually eat two pieces of fruit as a snack in the morning and during the afternoon. Fresh fruits are good snacks since one piece of fruit is usually 100 calories or less.
By the time I get home, my calorie count is usually about 800-900 calories. Most of my calories come at dinner, which means I can either eat out or have a dinner at home and have lots of snacks. I normally eat a handful of almonds every day, which is about 85 calories. A healer told me that if I ate at least 3 almonds a day, I would never get cancer. It sounds odd, but I'm doing it and I love eating almonds anyway. If I have a low calorie dinner, I splurge on snacks. I buy all my favorite low calorie snacks at places like Trader Joes. My low calories snacks include cheese puffs, cheese crunchies, caramel popcorn, graham crackers, sugar free chocolate, and english ginger cookies.
Eating has become like a fun game to play. I enjoy counting and measuring out my food. I am seriously thinking of investing in a scale, because not all food labels are precise about what constitutes one serving. Like how am I supposed to know how much one ounce of something is without a scale? Not having a scale has seriously decreased my snack options, since I only buy food that's easy to measure or count. I also enjoy surfing the net to find out how many calories are in restauarant food, if I do eat out. My analytical side gets a kick out of tyring to estimate how many calories are in a dish like pad thai.
As I noted in previous entries, I've had days where I can't follow my low calorie plan. These free for all days don't seem to have affected my weight loss rate, but I'm also only in the beginning of my new eating plan. A day or two off the wagon probably isn't going to affect my weight loss just yet. It will be interesting to see down the road, if a couple of free for all eating days will affect my weight loss trends. Right now, I think it's too early to tell.
I'm noticing that I do really well with a disciplined way of doing things, where I can combine my natural analytical side with my creative side. My current job as a financial reporting analyst appeals to both these sides. Someone tells me they want to see a certain data set. It's my job to figure out how to get that data set out of a large database, consisting of a million rows and up. It's up to me how to get the data, but I also have to be able to verify and justify the way I gathered the data to my bosses, clients and an auditing firm. My method has to make sense logically and also add up. Most of my job is just creative problem solving, how to get from point A to point B, but I also have to make sure that whatever I come up with adds up and makes sense. I'm alot like a regular old programmer designing reports, but I can't just spit out a report and hand it off to someone else to verify for accuracy. I'm the one who has to verify the accuracy of my data and my reports. You could say, I'm a little above a programmer, like a programmer plus.
I became a programmer plus by accident. I used to work at this one company where the reporting programmers in the IT department would create reports, but always said that the accuracy was totally dependent on the user/creator. As a user/creator, I hated their response and so did my bosses. I didn't understand why a programmer couldn't tell that their report was off, and then do something to fix it before it got to my desk.
I got started doing what I'm doing because the financial analysis group that I was working for, decided that they would bypass the IT department all together and have me program reports. I was the user/creator and the programmer all wrapped up in one. If my department wanted changes, they could have them right away and didn't have to wait for some crusty programmer's schedule to open up. It was a more hands on way of working for them, and I was good at it, very good. That was about 10 years ago, and this is the fourth company where I perform this function. What can I say, it's a living, it's creative in its own way, it pays the bills quite nicely, and I have my own office now.
My low calorie eating plan is going well. I'm not as strict as other low calorie eaters. I found a formula in the book Dieting Dummies, which I used to calculate how many calories I would need to eat to lose two pounds a week. You take your current weight and multiply that number by 10. Then you multiply your current weight by your activity level, the scale being 1 to 5. Then you mulitply your current weight by 1 to account for how many calories you burn for bodily functions. I think this is the formula. I have it in a spreadsheet at home, so I'll have to check if it's correct. The final amount is the number of calories you need to eat every day to maintain your current weight.
This the how I calculated my low calorie eating plan. My current weight was 168 pounds. 168 X 10 = 1,680. 168 X 4 = 672. I used 4 because I'm walking 5-6 miles a day. 168 X 1 = 168. These numbers together add up to 2,520. To lose two pounds a week, you subtract 1,000 from your total. You use 1,000 because you need burn or restrict 3,500 calories to lose one pound. To lose two pounds, you need burn or restrict 7,000 calories. 7,000 calories divided by 7 days is 1,000.
I'm looking at my formula, and I'm thinking something about it doesn't look right. I didn't buy the Fitness for Dummies book either, so if got it wrong, I'm like whatever. It's working.
Anyway, I try to eat 1,520 calories a day. Since I make my living as financial/reporting analyst, I track everything in an excel workbook complete with a graph and trend line to monitor my progress. Every day I input what I eat into a worksheet and the amount of calories per food item. Since I tend to eat the same foods, it's been relatively easy. I eat whatever I want, and there are no forbidden foods. But every day, my calorie total has to 1,520 or less.
Every day for work, I consume a breakfast of 300 or so calories. Breakfast is always the same. One Richard Schulze superfood shake with one cup of apple juice, one banana and water. I eat one packet of oatmeal sweetened with Equal, when I get work. I also drink two cups of coffee, with equal and soy milk or lactose free fat free milk.
Yes, I'm one of those people who drink soy milk. I was told I was lactose intolerant, so I drink soy milk or lactose free milk. I'm totally picky about my soy milk too, and only buy soy milk with less than 10 grams of carbos. There is no reason why soy milk should have more than 10 grams of carbos. If the soy milk does, then the manufacturer is putting lots of sugars into it, and there's no need to do that. I buy organic soy milk from a california grocery chain, not a health food store mind you, because they carry an organic soy milk brand with less than 2 grams of carbos. I used to only drink soy milk, but I'm experimenting with lactose free fat free milk for cereals.
For lunch, I usually have two cups of soup. I try to find a soup where one cup equals 100 calories or less. I also eat one serving of some kind of cracker or bread that is 100 calories or less. I also usually eat two pieces of fruit as a snack in the morning and during the afternoon. Fresh fruits are good snacks since one piece of fruit is usually 100 calories or less.
By the time I get home, my calorie count is usually about 800-900 calories. Most of my calories come at dinner, which means I can either eat out or have a dinner at home and have lots of snacks. I normally eat a handful of almonds every day, which is about 85 calories. A healer told me that if I ate at least 3 almonds a day, I would never get cancer. It sounds odd, but I'm doing it and I love eating almonds anyway. If I have a low calorie dinner, I splurge on snacks. I buy all my favorite low calorie snacks at places like Trader Joes. My low calories snacks include cheese puffs, cheese crunchies, caramel popcorn, graham crackers, sugar free chocolate, and english ginger cookies.
Eating has become like a fun game to play. I enjoy counting and measuring out my food. I am seriously thinking of investing in a scale, because not all food labels are precise about what constitutes one serving. Like how am I supposed to know how much one ounce of something is without a scale? Not having a scale has seriously decreased my snack options, since I only buy food that's easy to measure or count. I also enjoy surfing the net to find out how many calories are in restauarant food, if I do eat out. My analytical side gets a kick out of tyring to estimate how many calories are in a dish like pad thai.
As I noted in previous entries, I've had days where I can't follow my low calorie plan. These free for all days don't seem to have affected my weight loss rate, but I'm also only in the beginning of my new eating plan. A day or two off the wagon probably isn't going to affect my weight loss just yet. It will be interesting to see down the road, if a couple of free for all eating days will affect my weight loss trends. Right now, I think it's too early to tell.
I'm noticing that I do really well with a disciplined way of doing things, where I can combine my natural analytical side with my creative side. My current job as a financial reporting analyst appeals to both these sides. Someone tells me they want to see a certain data set. It's my job to figure out how to get that data set out of a large database, consisting of a million rows and up. It's up to me how to get the data, but I also have to be able to verify and justify the way I gathered the data to my bosses, clients and an auditing firm. My method has to make sense logically and also add up. Most of my job is just creative problem solving, how to get from point A to point B, but I also have to make sure that whatever I come up with adds up and makes sense. I'm alot like a regular old programmer designing reports, but I can't just spit out a report and hand it off to someone else to verify for accuracy. I'm the one who has to verify the accuracy of my data and my reports. You could say, I'm a little above a programmer, like a programmer plus.
I became a programmer plus by accident. I used to work at this one company where the reporting programmers in the IT department would create reports, but always said that the accuracy was totally dependent on the user/creator. As a user/creator, I hated their response and so did my bosses. I didn't understand why a programmer couldn't tell that their report was off, and then do something to fix it before it got to my desk.
I got started doing what I'm doing because the financial analysis group that I was working for, decided that they would bypass the IT department all together and have me program reports. I was the user/creator and the programmer all wrapped up in one. If my department wanted changes, they could have them right away and didn't have to wait for some crusty programmer's schedule to open up. It was a more hands on way of working for them, and I was good at it, very good. That was about 10 years ago, and this is the fourth company where I perform this function. What can I say, it's a living, it's creative in its own way, it pays the bills quite nicely, and I have my own office now.
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