Something about my apartment is just not conducive to me writing. I can type out my handwritten notes at home, but writing on the computer is just next to impossible I’ve decided. Not sure why this is happening either, but it’s definitely happening. I kind of think it’s because I spent a year working at home, and I’m still suffering from the effects of that whole experience. Not being able to write at home is such a drag, because sometimes it just works better if I can type on a computer and hand write everything by hand.

So I’m looking at two options to my writing dilemma. The first option is two buy a new palm pilot with a fold up keyboard. I met a woman in my science fiction writing class who wrote all her short stories this way, and wrote a 200-page novel on her Handspring Visor. She carried her visor and fold up keyboard in her purse and since it’s so compact and small, she carried it everywhere.

I’ve been looking at the new palm pilots, and my current favourite is the Tungsten E. It’s not prohibitively expensive, and features a colour screen. I’ve been thinking it would be fun to have a palm pilot to check email or surf the net, but I don’t need all those bells and whistles if I all I want to do is use my palm pilot to type out my stories.

My second option, and one that I’m seriously considering, is getting a Mac laptop. It’s been a fantasy of mine to own a Mac laptop. I have a pc at home, but I’ve always wanted a Mac laptop. I looked at the I-book at the Apple store, and it’s so small and light and not expensive at all compared to comparable pc laptops.

I have to buy Office for Mac to make sure I can trade files back and forth, and I probably have to upgrade my Final Draft screenwriting software so I can use it on both a Mac and a PC. Final Draft 7 is cross platform, and with one license you can install it on both a Mac and a PC. This must mean I’m not the only one who has a pc and a Mac.

I’m definitely getting a new palm. But I’m still up in the air on the Mac laptop. I just wish PC laptops weren’t so expensive compared to a Mac laptop, because then I’d probably get a PC laptop. But that Mac price is just so attractive!

I'm really getting exciting about that screenwriting expo I'll be attending in November. I think Andrew Sorkin Aaron Sorkin, creator and writer for "The West Wing" is going to be there, but lots of other famous Hollywood celebs and writers.

I'm turning into my younger sisters, who are rail thin (one is a size 2) and who have major anxiety stress problems. I thought my anxiety would go away today, but it's like not. It's so weird to feel like you want to constantly jump out of your skin. My youngest sister has heart palpitations, when she get nervous and says it's the worse feeling.

I think I'm going through the same thing. All day long my heart's been like jumping and racing around. It's the weirdest feeling, and so unnerving. I hate it, and I'm like I think I really need to see a doctor and/or a shrink.

I started keeping a journal just for writing, where I write to myself about what I'm working on. John Steinbeck kept one, as well as other famous writers.

So I was writing an entry this morning on my commute to work, when I figured something I didn't know about my own writing process. I need to keep writing, even if it's not on the project I want to write about. I think I got kind of stuck on wanting to only work on one project at at time, which is so not the way I normally work on projects at work. At work I have to work on several projects at a time, doing a little bit here and there to keep up with my deadlines.

I have to adapt my job working style to my writing style, so I don't have to invent a new way of working for myself. Sounds so simple doesn't it, but I so did not get this before. And I need to take into account that I have a short attention span with everything, and only do well with short term projects or long term projects broken into short term projects.

If I'm always writing, I'll have a backlog of projects that need typing up or editing. So when I'm in a phase like I am where I can't write anything new down, I can keep up with my writing because I'll always have work that needs typing up or editing. So I won't feel guilty for not writing because I'll always be working on a project related to my writing.

I think this is a brilliant insight, and something I wish I'd gotten five years ago. But oh well. Better late than never, I suppose.