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Sunday, December 01, 2002

I love these long weekends. They really make me feel like I've gotten away from the office, even though I didn't leave town.

I've got the "I finished my writing project" blues. I always feel so "blah and bleh", after I finish a writing project. That sense of urgency to complete my writing total for the day is gone now, and I've stopped living in that heightened sense of every day is a deadline. It's kind of an emotional let down really. Writing that intensely for me is like being on some kind of weird drug and when I stop, it's like I've crashed down to earth with a big thump and I can't get up again. Maybe the best thing is keep writing, or at least plan to start another writing project as soon as I finish one.

I know I should enjoy my writing time off when I have them, because there's the screenplay to finish before December 14. But it's hard not to feel like I've ground to a halt, because I've stopped writing. I wonder if I'm one of those people who has to be in perpetual motion to feel worthwhile.

I know I used to feel that way sometimes at work, that if I wasn't getting promoted every year there was seriously something wrong with me and I was failing at my job. Because what I'm going through right now, which is a vague sense of dissatisfaction, is sort of how I used to feel after I got my promotions. It's not exactly like I'm dissatisfied, but there's definitely a feeling of some kind of letdown. It's hard to explain.

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