I think I know why I've become such a freak at my current job. Most of the people here don't have anything else in their life other than this job. This job is their life and some of them went to school and put themselves into debt because they are passionate about healthcare.
I could care less about healthcare. I stumbled into it and I stay in it because I can make a decent income in a job that is relatively stress free work wise and easy for me. Yes, I'm a good at my job and have become something of a subject matter expert in the two years I've been here, I mean some people think I'm a nurse which is such a laugh for me, but it's not my life and it's just a way for me to make money. I have a pretty good work ethic, so of course I try to do well at my job, but healthcare isn't my life, isn't my "mission".
I want to write novels and screenplays for a living. I am passionate about writing books that commuters like me want to read, a book that makes transports them to a different world and makes them forget for a few minutes the horrible job that they are in. I love books that make me forget about my commute, forget where I am so much that I miss my stop. Books that make me forget the freaks on Muni I come into contact with every day are rare, but when I find them it's a joy. I never want the story to end, and when it does end I am bummed out, so bummed out that I end up reading all the books that the author has written just to recapture that feeling again.
I love movies that do the same thing to me, movie make me forget my horrible life for a couple of hours.
I admire people who are passionate about healthcare, or at the very least can pretend very well to be passionate about their job. A friend of mine says people who are that enthused about their job are just faking it, and that every0ne is feeling the same way I do only they're better at hiding it than I am. I wonder about that. I think if you go out and get hourself a masters in healthcare, that must mean you are passionate and want to work in the field.
I wish I could afford to work in a bookstore or some other dead-end job, anywhere but here in healthcare where I am a freak and not a happy freak at that.
Thursday, June 29, 2006
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
What else am I doing these days besides kvetching about my job. I am currently undergoing some aryuvedic treatment from a friend of mine who is studying to be a practitioner, and needed 10 volunteers to practice on.
She told me I was 48% kapha, 28% vata and 24% pitta. I am what they call a tri-dosha. I am on this new diet because she diagnosed me with a vata and kapha imbalance. I cannot eat cold foods, which is weird because this means no salads or cold sandwiches. This makes lunch very difficult for me since I usually eat a salad or a sandwich for lunch. I also am supposed to give sticky rice, but I can eat barley and basmati rice. I made barley rice last week and was surprised how much it tasted like regular rice. It's just hard to find barley rice at restaurant in downtown San Francisco.
For grains, I can also eat amaranth, brown rice, buckwheat, quinoa and wild rice. My friend thinks I might have a wheat allergy, which would suck because wheat is in everything. She told me I don't have to avoid it completely because I think that would be impossible. I knew someone who had a severe wheat allergy, and she basically couldn't eat out at a restaurant without freaking out because there wasn't anything there for her to eat. At Trader Joes I found two wheat free breads, spelt and kamut. Kamut is very dense, but spelt is not too bad. I'm not really supposed to eat oatmeal, but my friend said I could eat hot oatmeal for breakfast because it was better than eating cold cereal or the Balance bars I've been having for breakfast these past four years. I'm supposed to avoid corn flour as well, which bums out because this means no corn or flour tortillas!
The other food I'm supposed to be concentrating on is veggies. I cannot eat raw veggies. They have to be cooked. I can eat artichokes, beets, carrots, cauliflower, fresh corn, green beans, leeks, mustard greens, potatoes and tomatoes. I have to avoid my favourite veggie which is eggplant, which is okay because I haven't been in an eggplant eating mood for awhile. But no asparagus, sweet potatos or yams. I really like yams.
My friend says once my body gets back in balance I will be able to eat whatever I want, but until then I have to try to follow the new diet as best I can. I'm hoping the aryuvedic treatment will lead to some weight loss. My friend's first client lost 70 pounds, but she was very strict about her new eating rules. I am finding it hard to eat hot meals at lunch. I am so craving salads right now. But I know I have to change my eating habits. I feel so fat and all my clothes are tight, and I don't want to buy new clothes again.
But it's so hard to be healthy when I feel stressed out, and being in a job I don't like is a big stressor in my life right now. I am so whiny and unhappy these days.
She told me I was 48% kapha, 28% vata and 24% pitta. I am what they call a tri-dosha. I am on this new diet because she diagnosed me with a vata and kapha imbalance. I cannot eat cold foods, which is weird because this means no salads or cold sandwiches. This makes lunch very difficult for me since I usually eat a salad or a sandwich for lunch. I also am supposed to give sticky rice, but I can eat barley and basmati rice. I made barley rice last week and was surprised how much it tasted like regular rice. It's just hard to find barley rice at restaurant in downtown San Francisco.
For grains, I can also eat amaranth, brown rice, buckwheat, quinoa and wild rice. My friend thinks I might have a wheat allergy, which would suck because wheat is in everything. She told me I don't have to avoid it completely because I think that would be impossible. I knew someone who had a severe wheat allergy, and she basically couldn't eat out at a restaurant without freaking out because there wasn't anything there for her to eat. At Trader Joes I found two wheat free breads, spelt and kamut. Kamut is very dense, but spelt is not too bad. I'm not really supposed to eat oatmeal, but my friend said I could eat hot oatmeal for breakfast because it was better than eating cold cereal or the Balance bars I've been having for breakfast these past four years. I'm supposed to avoid corn flour as well, which bums out because this means no corn or flour tortillas!
The other food I'm supposed to be concentrating on is veggies. I cannot eat raw veggies. They have to be cooked. I can eat artichokes, beets, carrots, cauliflower, fresh corn, green beans, leeks, mustard greens, potatoes and tomatoes. I have to avoid my favourite veggie which is eggplant, which is okay because I haven't been in an eggplant eating mood for awhile. But no asparagus, sweet potatos or yams. I really like yams.
My friend says once my body gets back in balance I will be able to eat whatever I want, but until then I have to try to follow the new diet as best I can. I'm hoping the aryuvedic treatment will lead to some weight loss. My friend's first client lost 70 pounds, but she was very strict about her new eating rules. I am finding it hard to eat hot meals at lunch. I am so craving salads right now. But I know I have to change my eating habits. I feel so fat and all my clothes are tight, and I don't want to buy new clothes again.
But it's so hard to be healthy when I feel stressed out, and being in a job I don't like is a big stressor in my life right now. I am so whiny and unhappy these days.
What else am I doing these days besides kvetching about my job. I am currently undergoing some aryuvedic treatment from a friend of mine who is studying to be a practitioner, and needed 10 volunteers to practice on.
She told me I was 48% kapha, 28% vata and 24% pitta. I am what they call a tri-dosha. I am on this new diet because she diagnosed me with a vata and kapha imbalance. I cannot eat cold foods, which is weird because this means no salads or cold sandwiches. This makes lunch very difficult for me since I usually eat a salad or a sandwich for lunch. I also am supposed to give sticky rice, but I can eat barley and basmati rice. I made barley rice last week and was surprised how much it tasted like regular rice. It's just hard to find barley rice at restaurant in downtown San Francisco.
For grains, I can also eat amaranth, brown rice, buckwheat, quinoa and wild rice. My friend thinks I might have a wheat allergy, which would suck because wheat is in everything. She told me I don't have to avoid it completely because I think that would be impossible. I knew someone who had a severe wheat allergy, and she basically couldn't eat out at a restaurant without freaking out because there wasn't anything there for her to eat. At Trader Joes I found two wheat free breads, spelt and kamut. Kamut is very dense, but spelt is not too bad. I'm not really supposed to eat oatmeal, but my friend said I could eat hot oatmeal for breakfast because it was better than eating cold cereal or the Balance bars I've been having for breakfast these past four years. I'm supposed to avoid corn flour as well, which bums out because this means no corn or flour tortillas!
The other food I'm supposed to be concentrating on is veggies. I cannot eat raw veggies. They have to be cooked. I can eat artichokes, beets, carrots, cauliflower, fresh corn, green beans, leeks, mustard greens, potatoes and tomatoes. I have to avoid my favourite veggie which is eggplant, which is okay because I haven't been in an eggplant eating mood for awhile. But no asparagus, sweet potatos or yams. I really like yams.
My friend says once my body gets back in balance I will be able to eat whatever I want, but until then I have to try to follow the new diet as best I can. I'm hoping the aryuvedic treatment will lead to some weight loss. My friend's first client lost 70 pounds, but she was very strict about her new eating rules. I am finding it hard to eat hot meals at lunch. I am so craving salads right now. But I know I have to change my eating habits. I feel so fat and all my clothes are tight, and I don't want to buy new clothes again.
But it's so hard to be healthy when I feel stressed out, and being in a job I don't like is a big stressor in my life right now. I am so whiny and unhappy these days.
She told me I was 48% kapha, 28% vata and 24% pitta. I am what they call a tri-dosha. I am on this new diet because she diagnosed me with a vata and kapha imbalance. I cannot eat cold foods, which is weird because this means no salads or cold sandwiches. This makes lunch very difficult for me since I usually eat a salad or a sandwich for lunch. I also am supposed to give sticky rice, but I can eat barley and basmati rice. I made barley rice last week and was surprised how much it tasted like regular rice. It's just hard to find barley rice at restaurant in downtown San Francisco.
For grains, I can also eat amaranth, brown rice, buckwheat, quinoa and wild rice. My friend thinks I might have a wheat allergy, which would suck because wheat is in everything. She told me I don't have to avoid it completely because I think that would be impossible. I knew someone who had a severe wheat allergy, and she basically couldn't eat out at a restaurant without freaking out because there wasn't anything there for her to eat. At Trader Joes I found two wheat free breads, spelt and kamut. Kamut is very dense, but spelt is not too bad. I'm not really supposed to eat oatmeal, but my friend said I could eat hot oatmeal for breakfast because it was better than eating cold cereal or the Balance bars I've been having for breakfast these past four years. I'm supposed to avoid corn flour as well, which bums out because this means no corn or flour tortillas!
The other food I'm supposed to be concentrating on is veggies. I cannot eat raw veggies. They have to be cooked. I can eat artichokes, beets, carrots, cauliflower, fresh corn, green beans, leeks, mustard greens, potatoes and tomatoes. I have to avoid my favourite veggie which is eggplant, which is okay because I haven't been in an eggplant eating mood for awhile. But no asparagus, sweet potatos or yams. I really like yams.
My friend says once my body gets back in balance I will be able to eat whatever I want, but until then I have to try to follow the new diet as best I can. I'm hoping the aryuvedic treatment will lead to some weight loss. My friend's first client lost 70 pounds, but she was very strict about her new eating rules. I am finding it hard to eat hot meals at lunch. I am so craving salads right now. But I know I have to change my eating habits. I feel so fat and all my clothes are tight, and I don't want to buy new clothes again.
But it's so hard to be healthy when I feel stressed out, and being in a job I don't like is a big stressor in my life right now. I am so whiny and unhappy these days.
My friend K and I went to the member museum preview of the Matthew Barney exhibit at SFMOMA last week. From the SFMOMA website:
SFMOMA is the only U.S. venue for this full-scale survey, the first to gather together Matthew Barney’s entire DRAWING RESTRAINT series. Spanning almost 20 years, DRAWING RESTRAINT is an ongoing, performance-based project exploring the notion that form emerges through struggle against resistance. A site-specific installation designed by the artist, the exhibition occupies the Museum’s entire fourth floor, which has been reconfigured to eliminate the gallery walls and so encourage a nonlinear experience of the art.
The opening was your typical San Francisco artsy scene. While we were waiting in line outside, there was a couple walking around dressed like some of the images in the Matthew Barney exhibit. Sometimes it's hard to tell whether these people were dressed up especially for the exhibit or whether they were just being themselves because at any given moment in San Francisco someone is always in costume, but at a typical art opening the number of people in costume expands exponentially depending on the magnitude of the event and gravitas of the artist. At the Matthew Barney member opening, it felt like about 40% of the people attending were in costume. I just found it so fascinating that SFMOMA had such a variety of members. Besides the artsy fartsy crowd in costume, the blue-hairs were there as well as people who look like they would never walk into a museum let alot a modern art museum. It always makes what Andy Warhol would have thought about us all had he been standing outside SFMOMA last Wednesday night.
I love Matthew Barney. He does such interesting work with with sculptural material. There pieces of scuplture that looked like foam or a blob of shaving cream, but which are in fact hard to touch. There was a piece that looked like someone had put a huge slab of butter or dough on the floor. It's all so fascinating!
The artist Bjork was in his photos and in his films, and she added the rock star phenomena to his pieces. I love the juxtaposition that he was a football player and wrestler in his youth and is now this avant garde NYC artist. There is something about that combo that is so very strange.
Then there was these weird videos about fawns doing strange things in a limo. I thought they looked like birdies myself, but my friend K said there were men dressed as fawns and doing lewd and weird things in a limo driving through the streets of NYC.
You can read what the SFGate had to say about the Matthew Barney exhibit,
Matthew Barney, In Glory all his own.
SFMOMA is the only U.S. venue for this full-scale survey, the first to gather together Matthew Barney’s entire DRAWING RESTRAINT series. Spanning almost 20 years, DRAWING RESTRAINT is an ongoing, performance-based project exploring the notion that form emerges through struggle against resistance. A site-specific installation designed by the artist, the exhibition occupies the Museum’s entire fourth floor, which has been reconfigured to eliminate the gallery walls and so encourage a nonlinear experience of the art.
The opening was your typical San Francisco artsy scene. While we were waiting in line outside, there was a couple walking around dressed like some of the images in the Matthew Barney exhibit. Sometimes it's hard to tell whether these people were dressed up especially for the exhibit or whether they were just being themselves because at any given moment in San Francisco someone is always in costume, but at a typical art opening the number of people in costume expands exponentially depending on the magnitude of the event and gravitas of the artist. At the Matthew Barney member opening, it felt like about 40% of the people attending were in costume. I just found it so fascinating that SFMOMA had such a variety of members. Besides the artsy fartsy crowd in costume, the blue-hairs were there as well as people who look like they would never walk into a museum let alot a modern art museum. It always makes what Andy Warhol would have thought about us all had he been standing outside SFMOMA last Wednesday night.
I love Matthew Barney. He does such interesting work with with sculptural material. There pieces of scuplture that looked like foam or a blob of shaving cream, but which are in fact hard to touch. There was a piece that looked like someone had put a huge slab of butter or dough on the floor. It's all so fascinating!
The artist Bjork was in his photos and in his films, and she added the rock star phenomena to his pieces. I love the juxtaposition that he was a football player and wrestler in his youth and is now this avant garde NYC artist. There is something about that combo that is so very strange.
Then there was these weird videos about fawns doing strange things in a limo. I thought they looked like birdies myself, but my friend K said there were men dressed as fawns and doing lewd and weird things in a limo driving through the streets of NYC.
You can read what the SFGate had to say about the Matthew Barney exhibit,
Matthew Barney, In Glory all his own.
I am closing my AT&T dial-up account finally! I have been so ambivalent about keeping it because I had a personal web page with my stories and I was able to store pictures too, but it doesn't make sense for me to pay for a dial-up account and DSL. If only AT&T offered DSL in my neighborhood when I needed it, I would have stuck with them. But they didn't.
I will have to create a personal web page someday on the new AT&T (formerly SBC)/Yahoo. Ah well! Yes, I know my template is outdated and I need to update it more regularly, but well, who has time?
I am currently reading "Gods and Generals" by Jeff Shaara. I loved his father's book, "The Killer Angels" by Michael Shaara, which I recently read about two weeks ago. I am boning up on my War of Northern Aggression history, or as its learned in school, Civil War history. I would like to read all of Jeff Shaara's books, not to mention Shelby Foote's books.
I will have to create a personal web page someday on the new AT&T (formerly SBC)/Yahoo. Ah well! Yes, I know my template is outdated and I need to update it more regularly, but well, who has time?
I am currently reading "Gods and Generals" by Jeff Shaara. I loved his father's book, "The Killer Angels" by Michael Shaara, which I recently read about two weeks ago. I am boning up on my War of Northern Aggression history, or as its learned in school, Civil War history. I would like to read all of Jeff Shaara's books, not to mention Shelby Foote's books.
I love watching the USA show "Monk". Monk is so funny and I so relate to him because he is so very strange. I know what it's like to be weird but still respected because you're smart.
There was an episode on Monk where he had to infiltrate an office. People in the office started liking him, and it was so poignant because you could tell that this was the first time Monk ever felt accepted by people. Then of course, Monk being Monk, it didn't last and in the end the office people thought he was weird and things were back to normal for him.
I am so having a Monk experience at my job. I heard the secretary who was promoted to an analyst whisper loudly to the summer intern "don't talk so loud, Brenda is here." I am such a freak at my office. I know I shouldn't care because I deliberately don't hang out with the office crowd, but for whatever reason it still hurts. I wish it didn't hurt and I thought I was too old for it to matter, but you know it still hurts and I'm like thinking "JC, why have you abandoned me?"
Okay, I know I am being dramatic but that's what I feel like right now. I know it's all my fault because I don't hang out and I don't gossip, and I'm one of those office workers who keeps to themselves and don't really hang with people in my group, but other than that, I don't know what I did to deserve such treatment. It's not like I snitch on people like the other people in my group, who are the biggest gossips and snitches I've ever come across in any office.
People in my group act like they're still in junior high or high school and it's like some popularity thing at work. I have not come across such clickish behaviour in an office in such a long time. It's like totally alien to me. I wish I could be like the two other women in my office who don't hang out and don't care, and are senior managers. But I'm not a senior manager and I guess some part of me does care.
Honestly, I have never worked in such an immature office before. I'm like, I used to be really well liked in other departments at other companies I've worked for, but not this one. I hear gossip about our group all the time, about how we're so strange. We are a strange group! I thought the new director would change our group dynamic, but I think it's gotten worse.
I have to get out of my job. I spoke to this guy in another division in muy company on Friday about an open position that he has, but the timing for me to move into his group will not be right until September. If I have to work with people, I want to work for someone who recognizes me and likes me and this guy so does. We can talk for hours and hours about healthcare and its problems. He treats me better than anyone in my current department. Sad isn't it?
I don't know why I feel so sorry for myself right now about my working situation, but I do. But you know, it's always like this before I make a change in my life. Before I moved apartment, things got really bad and I started to hate living in my old place. Before I change any job, things get really bad. It's almost as if the universe is pushing me out the door and moving on to my next step in my life. Things get so bad that when I do move, I have no regrets. It's an odd way to move on to your next step in life, but one that is probably necessary for me because I'm the type who tends to get rooted very quickly. It takes alot for me move one and things have to get really bad before I even consider. Once I make up my mind though to move one, then things happen pretty quickly for me whether I'm ready for it or not.
I expect the same thing to happen now. I am so ready for a new job that I know things will start to happen very quickly so I can get out of my current situation. I've been thinking for about a couple of months now that I will not be in my job for the whole month of July.
When I first had this thought, I was so confused! I wasn't actively looking for a job and things weren't so bad. But as the month of June has progressed, my job and my attitude towards it have gotten progressively worse. Things have gotten so bad that I want out of my job at any cost! God, I hope something happens soon! I don't know how much I can take my job anymore. I hate not fitting in and having people talk about me like how our ex-secretary spoke about me today. I'm like what the hell did I do to deserve this?
There was an episode on Monk where he had to infiltrate an office. People in the office started liking him, and it was so poignant because you could tell that this was the first time Monk ever felt accepted by people. Then of course, Monk being Monk, it didn't last and in the end the office people thought he was weird and things were back to normal for him.
I am so having a Monk experience at my job. I heard the secretary who was promoted to an analyst whisper loudly to the summer intern "don't talk so loud, Brenda is here." I am such a freak at my office. I know I shouldn't care because I deliberately don't hang out with the office crowd, but for whatever reason it still hurts. I wish it didn't hurt and I thought I was too old for it to matter, but you know it still hurts and I'm like thinking "JC, why have you abandoned me?"
Okay, I know I am being dramatic but that's what I feel like right now. I know it's all my fault because I don't hang out and I don't gossip, and I'm one of those office workers who keeps to themselves and don't really hang with people in my group, but other than that, I don't know what I did to deserve such treatment. It's not like I snitch on people like the other people in my group, who are the biggest gossips and snitches I've ever come across in any office.
People in my group act like they're still in junior high or high school and it's like some popularity thing at work. I have not come across such clickish behaviour in an office in such a long time. It's like totally alien to me. I wish I could be like the two other women in my office who don't hang out and don't care, and are senior managers. But I'm not a senior manager and I guess some part of me does care.
Honestly, I have never worked in such an immature office before. I'm like, I used to be really well liked in other departments at other companies I've worked for, but not this one. I hear gossip about our group all the time, about how we're so strange. We are a strange group! I thought the new director would change our group dynamic, but I think it's gotten worse.
I have to get out of my job. I spoke to this guy in another division in muy company on Friday about an open position that he has, but the timing for me to move into his group will not be right until September. If I have to work with people, I want to work for someone who recognizes me and likes me and this guy so does. We can talk for hours and hours about healthcare and its problems. He treats me better than anyone in my current department. Sad isn't it?
I don't know why I feel so sorry for myself right now about my working situation, but I do. But you know, it's always like this before I make a change in my life. Before I moved apartment, things got really bad and I started to hate living in my old place. Before I change any job, things get really bad. It's almost as if the universe is pushing me out the door and moving on to my next step in my life. Things get so bad that when I do move, I have no regrets. It's an odd way to move on to your next step in life, but one that is probably necessary for me because I'm the type who tends to get rooted very quickly. It takes alot for me move one and things have to get really bad before I even consider. Once I make up my mind though to move one, then things happen pretty quickly for me whether I'm ready for it or not.
I expect the same thing to happen now. I am so ready for a new job that I know things will start to happen very quickly so I can get out of my current situation. I've been thinking for about a couple of months now that I will not be in my job for the whole month of July.
When I first had this thought, I was so confused! I wasn't actively looking for a job and things weren't so bad. But as the month of June has progressed, my job and my attitude towards it have gotten progressively worse. Things have gotten so bad that I want out of my job at any cost! God, I hope something happens soon! I don't know how much I can take my job anymore. I hate not fitting in and having people talk about me like how our ex-secretary spoke about me today. I'm like what the hell did I do to deserve this?
Thursday, June 22, 2006
I think M-Square is sick or something. I haven't spoken to him since we broke up but I can still pick things up from him, and I get that he is really sick. I have no idea what's wrong with him, and part of me wants to call and ask but I know that would not be a good thing.
The man obviously did not want me in his life anymore and for once I'm going to heed my friends' advice and not beg him to take me back. S0 many good things have happened to me since we broke up anyway, things I know wouldn't have happened had we still been together. So I am in the firm belief that it was all for the best that our relationship fizzled out.
The man obviously did not want me in his life anymore and for once I'm going to heed my friends' advice and not beg him to take me back. S0 many good things have happened to me since we broke up anyway, things I know wouldn't have happened had we still been together. So I am in the firm belief that it was all for the best that our relationship fizzled out.
This is so creepy! I was reading the headlines on SFGate.com when I see the name Darren Mack refusing to surrender in Mexico, and I'm like I know that name. Around 10 or so years ago, I took a Communications course from a guy named Darren Mack. He was dating someone named Charla, who also worked for the organization giving the course. I even saw Charla one night, and she had this stop you dead in your tracks diamond engagement ring on her finger. Darren said that Charla was the perfect woman for him. He also told the class that he was going through some terrible child custody court case with his first wife and their two kids.
I wasn't sure it was the same guy until I saw his picture, and it was him. How freaky! He was a very intense guy, and we kind of had a little run in on a conference call once. I had to hug him once after a seminar just because everyone was doing it, and I don't know ... it was very awkward ... I gave him a hug anyway but it was so awkward. He kind of creeped me out for whatever reason. No one else I knew was freaked out by him, but I was. I read in another news article that he and Charla left the organization I was taking classes from back in 2002. I stopped taking courses from that place in 1998.
Now Charla is dead, stabbed by Darren and he is being hunted by the police. Wow! You never know what people are capable of, until you read about them in the news or see them on TV wanted for murder.
I wasn't sure it was the same guy until I saw his picture, and it was him. How freaky! He was a very intense guy, and we kind of had a little run in on a conference call once. I had to hug him once after a seminar just because everyone was doing it, and I don't know ... it was very awkward ... I gave him a hug anyway but it was so awkward. He kind of creeped me out for whatever reason. No one else I knew was freaked out by him, but I was. I read in another news article that he and Charla left the organization I was taking classes from back in 2002. I stopped taking courses from that place in 1998.
Now Charla is dead, stabbed by Darren and he is being hunted by the police. Wow! You never know what people are capable of, until you read about them in the news or see them on TV wanted for murder.
Friday, June 16, 2006
This quote is from an article in the LA Times that came out on June 14 on A Wok With Jesus: Saving Souls in Chinese Kitchens: Thousands of Chinese kitchen workers live on the margins. A former restaurant owner tends to a subculture most Americans never see.
"Nationwide, more than 1 million immigrants work in 41,350 Chinese restaurants — from mom-and-pop takeouts to mammoth buffet enterprises employing hundreds, according to the Fremont, Calif.-based Chinese Restaurant News.Though many restaurants hire non-Asian workers, Lou's ministry concentrates on the Chinese — the people she knows best.It's a subculture hidden from most Americans. Speaking little or no English, many Chinese immigrants must settle for dispiriting kitchen work — laboring 12 hours a day, seven days a week.Many, here illegally, have no access to labor unions or social service networks. They live in cramped restaurant-owned dormitories or in rented garages without cooking facilities, bathrooms or running water.To cope with their harsh living conditions and mind-numbingly mundane work, many fall prey to gambling, drugs, alcohol and prostitution.Among the worn wooden chopping boards and flashing meat cleavers, hissing deep-fryers and walk-in freezers, the desire for a higher calling is fierce.
"In every kitchen, there's always the same tired old man hiding in the corner near the stove that is his life," Lou said. People in the restaurant business acknowledge a regimen called going "from the pillow to the stove," with no other life. Sadly, it's true," said Betty Xie, editor in chief of the Chinese Restaurant News. "Workers are lonely. They came from far away and don't have family with them. With no English skills, they don't have any choices."They're trapped by the restaurant life. They see no hope."
The phrase I red-fonted just brings tears to my eyes ... I don't know. Somehow I so relate to this image of the old man hiding in the corner. I feel like this in my job right now. My job is not my life, but I am so unhappy at my current job. It hasn't felt like home for these last years, and I keep getting distracted from leaving. It's all been for the best I know. There were lessons I needed to learn, people that I needed to meet, but I had such high hopes for this job that it was going to be a place where I could stay for awhile.
I know I need to give up this hope of ever being at home in job, and that my true job, my true life purpose is to focus on creative writing and not my job business writing of drafting a quality update for a regional medical directors meeting.
"Nationwide, more than 1 million immigrants work in 41,350 Chinese restaurants — from mom-and-pop takeouts to mammoth buffet enterprises employing hundreds, according to the Fremont, Calif.-based Chinese Restaurant News.Though many restaurants hire non-Asian workers, Lou's ministry concentrates on the Chinese — the people she knows best.It's a subculture hidden from most Americans. Speaking little or no English, many Chinese immigrants must settle for dispiriting kitchen work — laboring 12 hours a day, seven days a week.Many, here illegally, have no access to labor unions or social service networks. They live in cramped restaurant-owned dormitories or in rented garages without cooking facilities, bathrooms or running water.To cope with their harsh living conditions and mind-numbingly mundane work, many fall prey to gambling, drugs, alcohol and prostitution.Among the worn wooden chopping boards and flashing meat cleavers, hissing deep-fryers and walk-in freezers, the desire for a higher calling is fierce.
"In every kitchen, there's always the same tired old man hiding in the corner near the stove that is his life," Lou said. People in the restaurant business acknowledge a regimen called going "from the pillow to the stove," with no other life. Sadly, it's true," said Betty Xie, editor in chief of the Chinese Restaurant News. "Workers are lonely. They came from far away and don't have family with them. With no English skills, they don't have any choices."They're trapped by the restaurant life. They see no hope."
The phrase I red-fonted just brings tears to my eyes ... I don't know. Somehow I so relate to this image of the old man hiding in the corner. I feel like this in my job right now. My job is not my life, but I am so unhappy at my current job. It hasn't felt like home for these last years, and I keep getting distracted from leaving. It's all been for the best I know. There were lessons I needed to learn, people that I needed to meet, but I had such high hopes for this job that it was going to be a place where I could stay for awhile.
I know I need to give up this hope of ever being at home in job, and that my true job, my true life purpose is to focus on creative writing and not my job business writing of drafting a quality update for a regional medical directors meeting.
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Tuesday, June 06, 2006
I was reading this on a chatboard I belong to and I think I fit into this "box".
Newsweek - June 5, 2006 issue
It's a Lohasian moment. The term for these 21st-century New Agers derives from an acronym created by marketers on the West Coast—LOHAS, as in Lifestyles of Health and Sustainability. The movie "The Celestine Prophecy" is opening, based on the 1993 book that may be the most popular alternative-spirituality book of the past few decades. Next comes the film version of Dan Millman's book "Way of the Peaceful Warrior," about a lost young gymnast who is guided through a mystical transformation by a wise mentor. And Al Gore's movie on global warming, "An Inconvenient Truth," is bound to be popular with the ecologically minded Lohasians. LOHAS consumers (or Lohasians, as they're called at Beliefnet) represent 17 percent of the U.S. population, according to a report released by the Natural Marketing Institute at a LOHAS conference held in April in Santa Monica, Calif. The study said Lohasians are "dedicated to personal and planetary health." Seventy-three percent buy recycled-paper goods, and 71 percent buy natural or organic "personal care" products. They pay more to get foods without pesticides and want their cars fuel-efficient. Among the products and services offered at the conference this year were detoxifying pine oil, organic body lotion, ecofriendly spas and recycled-cashmere sweaters. A decade ago, one attendee said, the conference vendor room offered only "broccoli and tomatoes."Lohasians shop just as widely for spiritual practices. From Buddhism: meditation and admiration of "nothingness." From Hinduism: yoga, gurus, color and chanting. From paganism: an emphasis on honoring nature. From Asian cultures: feng shui and acupuncture. Lohasians devour heaping doses of Western psychotherapy, plus the ideas of the recovery movement ("one day at a time"). They identify as "spiritual, not religious," and many believe in "synchronicity" or "meaningful coincidences" that might be guided by a spirit world. Does this sound like someone you know? If you have a yoga mat and "singing bowls," if you chant or do polarity therapy or energy healing, if you consume goji berries or biodynamic organic wines, you just might be a Lohasian.
—Steven Waldman and Valerie Reiss
I own a yoga mat and took a class in energy healing, but I don't own singing bowls nor do I consume goji berries although I have a friend who is selling them. I think I still qualify.
Newsweek - June 5, 2006 issue
It's a Lohasian moment. The term for these 21st-century New Agers derives from an acronym created by marketers on the West Coast—LOHAS, as in Lifestyles of Health and Sustainability. The movie "The Celestine Prophecy" is opening, based on the 1993 book that may be the most popular alternative-spirituality book of the past few decades. Next comes the film version of Dan Millman's book "Way of the Peaceful Warrior," about a lost young gymnast who is guided through a mystical transformation by a wise mentor. And Al Gore's movie on global warming, "An Inconvenient Truth," is bound to be popular with the ecologically minded Lohasians. LOHAS consumers (or Lohasians, as they're called at Beliefnet) represent 17 percent of the U.S. population, according to a report released by the Natural Marketing Institute at a LOHAS conference held in April in Santa Monica, Calif. The study said Lohasians are "dedicated to personal and planetary health." Seventy-three percent buy recycled-paper goods, and 71 percent buy natural or organic "personal care" products. They pay more to get foods without pesticides and want their cars fuel-efficient. Among the products and services offered at the conference this year were detoxifying pine oil, organic body lotion, ecofriendly spas and recycled-cashmere sweaters. A decade ago, one attendee said, the conference vendor room offered only "broccoli and tomatoes."Lohasians shop just as widely for spiritual practices. From Buddhism: meditation and admiration of "nothingness." From Hinduism: yoga, gurus, color and chanting. From paganism: an emphasis on honoring nature. From Asian cultures: feng shui and acupuncture. Lohasians devour heaping doses of Western psychotherapy, plus the ideas of the recovery movement ("one day at a time"). They identify as "spiritual, not religious," and many believe in "synchronicity" or "meaningful coincidences" that might be guided by a spirit world. Does this sound like someone you know? If you have a yoga mat and "singing bowls," if you chant or do polarity therapy or energy healing, if you consume goji berries or biodynamic organic wines, you just might be a Lohasian.
—Steven Waldman and Valerie Reiss
I own a yoga mat and took a class in energy healing, but I don't own singing bowls nor do I consume goji berries although I have a friend who is selling them. I think I still qualify.
Monday, June 05, 2006
I went to a seminar with Julia Cameron tonight. She wrote "The Artist's Way" and "Vein of Gold." The woman sounded exactly like Joan Cuzak. She even had the same mannerisms. Cameron said she lives in Manhattan, a block away from Central Park, but her voice is soooo Chicago.
It was fun that she named dropped. She was engaged to Martino Scorcese and worked at The Washington Post during the Watergate era and knew Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein.
Cameron talked about morning pages, and I decided I needed to start doing them again. It's been years since I've done them, and I know I so rebelled against doing them. But it got the feeling that it was time to do to them again.
I went to Walgreen's after the class and picked up these really cool notebooks and new pens. I love buying new equipment when I'm about to start a project.
I was talking to a woman about one of my novels, and she told it was selfish to not want to write if I had the gift of writing. She told me she couldn't even imagine writing a fictional novel. I don't know. Maybe I am being selfish for not writing especially when I seem to easily make up stories. It's an issue that I am seriously pondering tonight.
Am I being selfish when I don't write because I was given the gift of writing?
It was fun that she named dropped. She was engaged to Martino Scorcese and worked at The Washington Post during the Watergate era and knew Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein.
Cameron talked about morning pages, and I decided I needed to start doing them again. It's been years since I've done them, and I know I so rebelled against doing them. But it got the feeling that it was time to do to them again.
I went to Walgreen's after the class and picked up these really cool notebooks and new pens. I love buying new equipment when I'm about to start a project.
I was talking to a woman about one of my novels, and she told it was selfish to not want to write if I had the gift of writing. She told me she couldn't even imagine writing a fictional novel. I don't know. Maybe I am being selfish for not writing especially when I seem to easily make up stories. It's an issue that I am seriously pondering tonight.
Am I being selfish when I don't write because I was given the gift of writing?
Just finished filling out my absentee ballot for tomorrow's election, which I will hand into my polling place tomorrow. In all my years of living in the City and County of San Francisco, I have not once voted for Dianne Feinstein or Nancy Pelosi. I just leave those sections blank since I can't stand either person.
I voted for Fiona Ma only because voting for Janet Reilly would be like voting in Katie Couric for public office. An ex-television reporter married to a one-time political consultant great does not make for a great politician I think.
I voted No on every San Francisco measure especially the one concerning money. I thought the city was out of money. Guess not!
And for whatever reason Phil Angelides just bugs me. I think Steve Westly is more my kind of democrat because I like my politicians to have business experience.
And yes I voted for Jerry Brown for Attorney General, but not Deborah Ortiz for Controller.
I voted for Fiona Ma only because voting for Janet Reilly would be like voting in Katie Couric for public office. An ex-television reporter married to a one-time political consultant great does not make for a great politician I think.
I voted No on every San Francisco measure especially the one concerning money. I thought the city was out of money. Guess not!
And for whatever reason Phil Angelides just bugs me. I think Steve Westly is more my kind of democrat because I like my politicians to have business experience.
And yes I voted for Jerry Brown for Attorney General, but not Deborah Ortiz for Controller.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)