A past life memory From Dogon

I saw him but he didn't see me. I wondered where he’d been, who he’d been with, but I knew I would never ask him and he would never tell me. He was strolling along the path that led to our home like he didn’t have a care in the world, but I could tell it was just an act. He was angry, and I knew I was the cause of his anger.

I left the window and went to sit in my favorite chair. It was more of a throne really, but it was very comfortable. The villagers had made it for me, and although I did not want to accept it at first, he told me it would be rude if I turned it down. That was many, many years ago in a much happier time.

We were both happy then when we came to this place. Everything was so new and so different, and we worked very hard to teach the people about who we were and where we came from. But the people here were so primitive, teaching them proved extremely difficult. Nothing in the briefing reports had prepared us for this level of ignorance.

He said it was inevitable that we would be treated like a god and his goddess. But I thought we were brought here to change that behavior, not reinforce them, I told him.  He did not agree. We were talking about behavior for a much more advanced civilization. We would get them to that point, but not right now. I did not agree and we had argued for days. We were still arguing really, because neither of us wanted to concede our positions. But we let it go. We did not fight. We agreed to disagree, but that was start of our disagreement, our anger, which simmered quietly through the years, and which led to this point where we were barely talking to each other. Where he would disappear for hours but always coming back home at night. Where the villagers would bring me stories of where he went and who he was with, and I would smile and thank them, and they cry at night. And the dry my tears before he returned home.

I could smell her on him, even though I know he tried to rid himself of all smells. Somehow her scent always remained. My rival, what a strange thought. We had been together for millions of years, and I was worried about another woman. She was not the first and she would not be the last. I knew that, but somehow on this planet it hurt more than it did in other places.

A past life memory when we left Egypt to go to Maldeck to escape the cataclysm about to happen on earth

The ships were getting ready to leave soon to take us to the planet Maldeck. There was no other way to survive the comet that was headed towards earth but to leave and go somewhere else, and come back when the land was once again habitable.

I was leaving with a heavy heart because I knew my daughter was not coming with us. She wanted to stay on earth. She had seen her future, and it involved staying here to help the people if there were any left survive. She was a high priestess of Anubis. She was adored and worshipped, and she felt it was her job, her calling, her mission to stay with the people through this journey of death.

I did not fear for her safety. I know Anubis would take care of her, heal her back to health if she was wounded. She herself was a gifted healer, and probably could heal herself if needed. But I feared that this task that she taken on would be too much for her. She did not want to admit, but staying here would bring her great suffering as well as great power. Sometimes I wondered if she was doing it for the power for she was such a greedy person, but another part of me knew she felt responsible for the people here, our people, her people.

Could we have stopped the comet? She thinks we could have, with all of our power, but I am not so sure. I am a fatalist at heart, and if we were meant to stop the comet we would have found a way. What we did instead was find a way to escape, so we could take all of earth’s brilliant treasures to another planet for safekeeping until this planet was ready to once again support life.

Already the floods had submerged most of what we had called Atlantis. And this comet would destroy the great capital of Atlantis, which we call Egypt. The Council of Elders had promised those who were ready to leave this planet,  that a team of scientists had gathered to try and find away to stop the planet earth from being destroyed by space debris. The endless cycle of rebirth and destruction was retarding the growth of this planet. Whenever progress was being made, another comet would come around to destroy everything that was built so it was lie starting from scratch all over again. Some had even said we would not be allowed to come back to earth, unless we had a solution to this ongoing barrage of space debris like comets hitting the planet and constantly pushing back the forward evolution of earth

I hope they figure it out and figure it out fast.

A past life memory from an ancient time on the planet Venus.

I thought I loved him, and that our love was strong enough for anything. We had already been through so much together in countless number of lifetimes. Had he not saved me? Had he not rescued me from those many lifetimes where I was exploring my darkside, reveling in the cold and cruel world of negativity? Until I was finally able to leave all of it behind and come back to the light.

But what he was asking was too much. I knew it deep down. I told him, argued with him, but he wouldn't listen. And now I had a choice. Either join him to go down to that new planet which was only just evolving or stay here, and perhaps never see him for God only knows how long.

I went to the window of our house and looked outside. I loved our house here on Venus. The redness of this world was so beautiful. The heat was divine. We had built this house here on this rather desolate planet as our refuge. No one really lived here anymore since the planet was too hot for any kind of life to survive. But we liked it only because we could adapt to any planetary conditions and still live a normal kind of life. This was supposed to be our refuge, where we would stay and rest, not go of traipsing on some unknown planet that was exploring the concept of limitation in every form.

Staring out of the window of this house usually snapped me out of any misery, but not this time. I turned around and walked over to  large crystal sculpture which was sitting on a table in the entrance to our home. It looked like any art piece only it wasn’t just an art piece. It was a record of every life I had ever lived.

I had an incarnation as a crystal being, and the nature of a crystal was to record everything into each of the crystal cells. But crystals are hard and can be chipped off, which I found out by mistake in another life. Every time I chipped off a piece of myself, the crystal would contain all the memories of the life had lived. And so I made the practice after every life to chip two small pieces off of myself. I believe some might call pieces of their soul, but it was really just pieces of my being.

One piece would be buried in the land that I had lived. The crystal piece would hold all the memories and also act as a locator, in case I ever wanted to return to this place for any reason. I had never gone back to any place, but it was nice to know I could go back to any place I had ever been. The second piece came back with me to this house, and was fitted to the sculpture. The best thing about the sculpture was I could touch a crystal and download all of the memories from that life.

I wanted to touch that sculpture again  and relive all of our happy memories. I hadn't touched the sculpture in millions of years, but I couldn’t honestly remember the last time I had been this unhappy. I needed those memories now. I needed those thousand of lifetimes of our memories to help me choose what to do. I couldn’t lose him again, not now.

A past life memory from a possible future timeline.

At 10 am an announcement was made through my building’s PA system that all US citizens were now subject to random genetic testing, and the occupants of our building were going to be taken to a testing center at a nearby research facility in Palo Alto for the test. Everyone on my floor stood up and we all looked at each other in surprise. I had seen the reports on alternative news websites about the random genetic testing, and about the government efforts to find those citizens suspected of having a large number of alien genetics. But some part of me didn’t know if those reports were true or false.  There was nothing on mainstream media  about the random genetic testing, and you would think that if the government was rounding up large groups of people to test that the  mainstream media would be reporting on what was going on because it affected so many people.

But before anyone had a chance to say anything, I saw what looked like soldiers  in combat gear walking around the floor and position themselves so there was a soldier for each two rows of cube. The building PA announcer came on again and told us to get ready to leave the building and follow the soldiers outside. We could bring food if we wanted and other personal effects, but we could not take our cellphones and purses. Food and water we were bringing had to be carried or had to fit in our coats and jackets.

I sat down and unlocked my drawer to open my purse. I took my makeup bag, a pen and paper, and other things I thought I would need and stuffed into the jackets of my ski jacket, grateful I had this jacket today with its many pockets. I locked and my drawer, and searched through my backpack for a protein bar which I carried for emergencies and grabbed my water bottle which thankfully was already full of water. I was debating whether to try and smuggle my cellphone, but decided against it in case I was caught.

I heard a large tapping on the wall of the building so I stood up and saw that everyone else on my side of the floor already had their jackets and coats on except for me. I hurriedly put on my coat and as soon as it looked like I was ready the solider standing in front our cubes yelled “Follow me and no talking!”. He walked towards the elevator and my cube mates and I lined up and followed him. I looked at person behind me who was a good office friend, and she shrugged her shoulders and shook her said. I looked into her eyes and I knew she was as scared as I was, but we both knew there very little we could do about our situation. The soldier who was assigned to our cube rows opened the floor door and indicated that we should walk through.  There were more soldiers in the elevator bank. When the elevator door opened, one of the soldiers stepped into the elevator and told us to get in. They tried to cram as many people as could fit into an elevator, and I was glad when we reached the lobby and doors opened.

There were more soldiers in the lobby directing people where to go. Outside of our building were four large white buses and the soldiers were escorting people onto the bus. Before you could get on the bus, each passenger was scanned by another soldier with what looked like a satellite dish. The solider with the satellite dish pointed it a person and if it detected something, I watched as another soldier search that person and find a cellphone. The solider took the cellphone and tossed into one of those large grey bins that you see at airport security checks. The bin looked to be full of phones. I shook my head glad that I decided not to smuggle in my cellphone.

But even after the cellphone search, there was another body search and I saw pens and paper being discarded as well into another grey bin. I guess the military didn’t want anybody recording anything about the genetic random testing. It also also looked like the military had blocked off our street because there were no cars going by outside and I did not see the usual stream of people walking around outside on our side of the street and also across the street. I wondered if people from other buildings could look down and see what was happening, and what they thought.

When it was finally our turn to step outside the building, I looked up and saw that a large white tent had been erected which blocked the view of what was going on with our building from onlookers in surrounding buildings.  This meant that no one could see what was happening, and all they would see I think is the four white buses leaving the tented area. I couldn’t see any military vehicles either. But I did notice that outside of the tent were men dressed in navy blue jumpsuits and navy blue baseball hats surrounding the perimeter of the tent like guards.  If the men in the navy blue jumpsuits set up the tent and the soldiers came in the large buses, no one watching the tents being set up would even know this was a military operation.

When it was my turn to get on the bus, I passed the satellite dish test but during the hand search test the solider found my pen and paper and threw them into the bin. He didn’t say anything and indicated that I should get on the bus. Another soldier was standing in the middle of the bus and indicated that I should sit in one of the empty seats near him. Thankfully it was a window seat so I could see outside. The soldier on the bus kept repeating no talking if someone said something, so we were not being allowed to talk about what was happening to us.

The process to get the whole building into these buses went quickly, and soon as bus was full of people the book took off. There was no military escort so as not to draw attention to the bus, and the bus was one of those commuter buses that were taking employees down the peninsula to Yahoo or Google, so there was nothing to indicate to the outside world that my whole building was being kidnapped by the US government for some crazy random genetic testing.

I started to feel sleep and noticed that people around me were starting to feel sleepy as well. I vaguely wondered if the Army was pumping the bus full of gas to make us sleep. I had the wild urge to stand up to see if the soldier who had remained on our bus had put on a gas mask, but I was too afraid. I looked down at my watch and saw that it was 10:30 am and then I blacked out.

I heard a loud noise and jerked awake. For a second I didn’t know where I was, and then it all came back to me. I looked down at my watch and saw it was 11:30 am. Wherever the bus had taken us, it was an hour away from downtown San Francisco. I looked outside and saw that the bus was parked in some kind of building. A voice came over the bus speaker system and told us to stand up and to move outside of the bus. I stood up and saw people lining up to get off the bus.

We were herded by another solider as soon as we stepped off the bus into a long line of people who heading towards a room that was located almost to the end of the large building where the buses were parked. I looked around but there was not much to see. Anything that would distinguish what this building had been taken down, and the place looked very empty like it had hardly been used.

I looked at the faces of the people in line some of whom I knew from work, and all I could was fear. This experience was so out of our realm of experience that I was sure some people were in shock. I think I was in shock as well because I felt like I was in the middle of some bad dream and that I was going to wake up at any time. And if it was a dream, why was my dream full of people from work. I hardly dream about people from work, and if people from work are in my dreams, it is only the ones that I know very well or who are in charge like the CEO or VP of my division.

The room where we being led to was also large. There were people lined up and being made to stand in front of a large scanner. On the other side of the scanner, were three groups of more people. Once you were scanned, you were led into one of the groups.  The first group had 10 people. The middle group had numbers that looked to be twice that size, and third group was the largest. I wasn’t sure what group what was what, but I assumed that the smallest group were the people who had the largest amounts of alien DNA. I didn’t think there could be that many humans with much alien DNA. I looked at the people in smallest group, and there was nothing to indicate that there so called reptilians types of Nordics.  They looked like ordinary people. I had even been meetings in some of them and they didn’t stand out in anyway. They were smart but everyone at work was smart.

When it my turn to turn in front of the scanner, I saw there was a person in a lab coat turning on the scanner.  Behind the person in the lab coat were two soldiers who looked to be overseeing the process.  I felt somebody staring at me and looked up and was surprised to find another room high above where we were with glass windows.  I didn’t notice it when I was scanning the room earlier. Looking down on me were a group of military types in more formal uniforms, and some of the uniforms were covered in medals.  Then I saw another odd looking person on the right of the medaled group of soldiers. He was very tall and blonde and looked to be wearing some kind of robe. He was dressed like a character out of a Star Trek movie or maybe even Star Wars because the robe looked like something a monk would wear.

The monk-robed man started staring at me, so I looked down feeling a little creeped out. I felt the air around me vibrate and I looked up to see the shocked faces of the people in front of me. The vibration stopped, and the man in the lab coat smiled at me. All of a sudden there was the sound of a ringing phone, and the man in the lab coat reached into his pocket and took out his cellphone. He didn’t say anything but I watched as he nodded while staring at me the whole time. The man in the lab coat dropped his phone back into this lab pocket coat, and walked over to one of the soldiers and said something to him. Something was going on.

The soldier walked over to me and told me come to follow him.  He led me past the man in the lab coat and went to stand near a set of doors. I looked back to see if anyone had noticed, but there was another person standing in front of the scanner so they were continuing on as if nothing had happened. I scanned the line of people and some of were looking in my direction, but then a group of soldiers came up and lined up in front of them them blocking their view.

I heard a noise and the door opened and the solider told me to step into the room. As I entered the room I saw an elevator open and another solider standing there. The door closed being me. The soldier told me to step into the elevator. I stepped into the elevator and the door closed, and the elevator went up with just me in it.

The elevator door opened and standing outside the elevator was the monk-dressed tall blonde man. He nodded and gestured for me to step outside. The men in the uniforms with the the medals were there studying me.

I heard a voice in my head saying don’t be afraid. I looked back at the monk-dressed tall blonde man and he nodded as if to acknowledge that he was the voice I was hearing in my head. As he was able to read my thoughts, he said in my head, “Don’t worry about the others. They will not be harmed. But they will be categorized. Don’t use your mouth to speak. Use your mind.”

“Why am I here?” I said in my mind wondering if he could hear me. “Your percentage of alien DNA is the highest we have tested so far. The generals are all wondering why no one has flagged you. Your military keeps track of people that they suspect of having high percentages of alien DNA. You were looked at but never flagged, and that bothers them. Why you ask? Because they are now wondering how many people they have missed. Your presence has caused a national security emergency.”

“But I am not an alien. I am human like everybody else.” I screamed in my head.

The monk-robed tall blonde man smiled. “If you didn’t have a high percentage of alien DNA, we wouldn’t be having this mind to mind conversation. A normal human would take years of training to do what you are doing without any training. But don’t worry. It will all be explained. There have been legends, rumors really, about the reptilians hiding their offspring in plain sight. The reptilian children often do not know they are reptilian and go about their normal lives until something happens to trigger their abilities. In your case, your government had been tracking you because at age 9 you were tested and had the reading level of an 18 year old. Such intelligence anomalies in children are automatically flagged and case files are opened up to study these children. I have read your file and although you had an intelligence anomaly and some physical anomalies like extraordinary eyesight and better than average physical abilities, there was nothing that out of place to warrant testing further. Oh, you were always watched and your file is full of observations about your life but there was nothing to suggest that you had the high percentage of alien DNA that the scanner found. In fact, until my people made the modifications last year, you probably would have tested into group 2. Group 2 is for people with a high amount of alien DNA but not enough for the government to be concerned about for national security.”

“And what exactly is my percentages of alien DNA?” I asked again in my head. I wasn’t sure I really wanted to know the answer to this question, but I felt that I needed to ask.

"67%, which means 2/3 of your DNA is not of human origin. And for your information, the highest we have found is 40%. And those people that have the 40% alien DNA could not have a mind to mind conversation because I have tested them myself. We much to talk about you and I. You will need to undergo further testing. Your government wants to make sure we find those that are like you, and they want to use you as the test experiment.”

A past life memory from ancient Egypt.

I looked at the head priest from the Anubis temple, and wondered why he had asked to have an audience with me. My husband was away with the overseer for a few days to check on the granaries, so I knew he felt safe coming to the palace. Although my husband had diminished the influence of the head priests and their many gods, they were still well-respected members of our kingdoms. I looked at him kneeling before me patiently, and sighing I raised my hand so he could stand up and speak.

“My Queen, may the God Anubis bestow many blessings upon you for your health and happiness, and may Ra forever bless you.” I nodded and smiled. He always started sessions with those blessings, which always sounded so sincere but which always left me wondering whether it was all just an act.

“How is my daughter doing in her schooling? I trust she is not giving you any trouble.” My oldest daughter had begged to be taught at the Anubis temple, and after many months of persuasion, my husband had finally agreed to let her go and study there.  The temple schools were the best in the land, and although he had launched a campaigning to stamp out the influence of the ancient gods in hopes of instilling in the country his one true God, even he had to admit that our daughter would receive the best education if she was educated in a temple.

“She is a wonderful student. She has  already been talked about by the teachers as being at the top of several of her classes.” The head priest recited with pride.

“Good. Then can I assume you are here for another reason although I cannot understand what that reason would be”

The head priest nodded, and then clapped his hands once. I felt the air shift a little, and when I looked back at the Anubis head priest I saw that he had assumed the visage of Anubis himself. “Daughter, know who I am?” Anubis growled at me. I think he was trying to intimidate me, but I was not afraid.

“You are the great God Anubis” I said matter of factly.Anubis smile and bowed. “To what do I owe the pleasure of you being here at court.”

“Your daughter will one day be my head priestess. And for giving me your daughter, I would like to offer you something that I have never offered outside of the temple. I wish to give you the gift of being able to call on me for protection, and for the gift to reincarnate with you so you will always have it.”

“What does that mean exactly?“

Been going out after work so I haven't felt like writing. It takes a lot to get into the space where I can remember a past life memory. But I do want to keep up the habit of writing every day, so here goes.

A past life memory from Dogon

We were alone finally, and I felt exhausted. There were too many people to attend to. Too many people who were following us around, wanting us to touch them so they could be blessed. This was not why we came here. We did not come here to be worshipped as gods. We came here to teach, to lead. He told me were coming to teach and lead.

I looked at the man, my twin, whom I had been for so many lifetimes. When did he change I wonder? He wasn’t like this when we first came to this planet. He only wanted to teach these people that we found.  So we taught them about our planets. We thought them what we knew. We told them about our four sets of twins, who would come later. We told them about the water beings that lived on our twin planet, that had come here ahead of us to live in the sea. We told them that these water beings would stay here and help guide them, if they were ever in the water.  We went to the sea and summoned them, and the people marveled at the dolphins and whales who came close enough to shore to be seen.

But after two years, something changed in how these people regarded us. I sometimes wonder if people started treating us differently when they realized that after two years we hadn’t changed, we hadn’t aged like they did. I wanted to explain it them, but he told me not too. He said it would confuse people if they knew nothing could harm us. It wasn’t really true that we could not be killed, but it would take a lot to kill us and we doubted anyone had the knowledge to kill us.

So instead of treating us like teachers, as honored guests of their culture, the people started treating us as special people. We were moved to a larger living dwelling. I protest but he said that we needed the extra space anyway. Our daily classes became larger as more and people wanted to learn what we were teaching. I was actually quite happy that more people wanted to lear, so I rationalized to myself that this new elevation in status was for the good.

But I think I knew deep down that this was all wrong, that we were heading down a path that if not stopped now, would be harder and harder to leave once started.But the changes the villagers were making were so gradual, that I think I could be forgiven if I said it was hard to complain when only gradual changes were being made. Besides, I did not blame these earth people. I blamed my husband. He knew exactly what he was doing. And what’s more, I knew that he was welcoming these changes.

A memory from the past life with the Elf Man.

I am dying, wasting away. I am betraying every elfin law I know but letting myself die this way, but I do not care. Some part of me tells me there will be karma to pay for countless lifetimes, but even that dire pronouncement elicits no response.

I didn’t think I would ever hurt this way, feel this damaged, this broken. I feel like part of my soul was ripped in half, stolen so brutally, that time itself will never heal the scar. The scar will be open and bleeding, and part of my soul will forever be leaking away drop by drop through the centuries.

I sit in our lovely house, looking out the window at the sea. The beautiful wide sea, with all its power and immensity. I keep thinking that he will come back to me. That what I saw was a nightmare and I will wake up soon, and my beloved elf man will be here next to me nuzzling my neck the way he does so every waking morning of our life.

But I do not wake up because I do not sleep. I cannot sleep. When I sleep, the nightmares come. The moments I last saw you come back in all its cruelty, and I wake up screaming and crying. I cannot relive, will not relive those moments ever again, so I stopped sleeping.  I stopped eating as well because eating reminds me of you. Being out in the garden and working reminds me of you. Everything reminds me of you. But sitting at at the window staring out at the sea does not remind me of you, even though I know I have often sat here waiting for you to come home.

The plant devas come and plead with me to take care of the plants in the garden. They saw what happened as well, so they know my pain. They tell me that I can go on, that I can live again, and that they will help me find my joy again. I smile at them but I say nothing. They are persistent.  They come every day, and talk to me, plead their case.  And every day I smile and listen to them, and at the end, I say nothing.  Sometimes I fear they will find other elves to come and talk to me, but there are no other elves left.  There are very few of us left in this world now. And the ones that are left, have gone far underground or have made themselves as small as birds that one cannot even see them.  A few have gone to live with the humans vowing to adapt themselves to that world.

I keep asking myself why didn’t either of us see this situation coming. We had always been able to see our future so we could stay ahead of it.  We wouldn’t have lived this long without staying steps ahead of the future. Where did we go wrong? You once told me a long time ago before we started down this path, that we would only be able run for so long and that the future and time will catch up with us. But even you weren’t sure when that time would come, and if it would come at all.

Did you know that time was catching up with us and not tell me? Because if you did know, then it was cruel of you not to tell me. Did you think it would spare me?  Could not you foresee my future and how I would feel? That by not telling me, you would condemn me to to this ever spinning vortex of pain. By not telling me you would banish me to a world where feelings of hatred and misery would intertwine within me and solidify as one feeling quite indistinguishable from each other. And that feeling would do its best to try and extinguish any love that I have for you. And that I would spend what is left of my life protecting the love I have for you from the misery/hate I have for you.

And that in the end, I would long for death, wish for death even more than I ever longed for you, so I could protect the love that I have for you in my heart.

And it is our love which is keeping me alive right now. Because in the end at the final end of my life, our love wants to win, wants to stay in my heart, and banish all the hatred and misery away. So in my final moments, I will not see your final moments with me but the first moment I knew I loved you and I knew that you loved me. Because this is the memory that our love wants me take into eternity.

This memory fragment came this afternoon, although I have had different variations of this memory previously.

We are all standing in line in front of a large glass box.  There are armed guards everywhere. Everyone is terrified. The person who looks to be in charge is surveying the crowd.  He looks like your typical movie villain evil professor with glasses, a shiny slightly bald head, and a clipboard. 

There is a makeshift command center in front of him connected to the glass box. The glass box is full of different colored balls.  The whole thing seems dream like but not a good dream, more like a nightmare.  I have a memory of sitting in my cube at my laptop and hearing the fire alarm go off,  and then instead of the typical announcement that we should evacuate building or that this was a fire alarm test, the voice announced that we should all go up to the top floor of our building where there is a large conference room.  After the announcement, we all stood up asking each other what was going on and then the doors opened and the armed guards walked in signaling everyone to get to the elevators. One of the talky people on the floor asked what was going on, and we saw the guard put his gun to the man's head and motioned him to elevator bank. After that, no one said anything and we silently walked towards the elevators with our heads down.

When we got to the floor, there were more armed guards to direct us where to go.  I looked at the guards, and they were wearing US Army gear so I didn't think we were being held hostage by some terrorist group but it was frightening.  Why hadn't management said anything?

The evil professor motioned to one of the guards, and he came over. Evil professor started saying something and the guard had to bend his head down to hear him because he was at least a foot taller than the professor. The guard nodded and walked over the first person in line.  He motioned for the first person to stand in front of the glass box.

Evil professor walked back to the makeshift command center and lifted up what looked like some kind of helmet.  He walked over to the man standing in front of the box and motioned for him to put it on. The helmet had all sorts of antennas all over it. Evil professor went back to the controls, and nodded to the guard. The guard said very loudly, "See if you can lift the balls up with your mind. The helmet will help you".  This is the first time I think I have heard the guard speak.

The first man in line looked into the box, and closed his eyes.  Poor guy. He lifted his hands up and they were trembling. He raised both hands up as if he was willing the balls to move, but nothing happened.  After what seemed like a few minutes, the guard said to stop and told the man to take the helmet off.  Another guard came up and directed the man to stand in the left corner of the room, where another guard was standing.

One by one each person in line put the helmet one, and no one could make the balls move.  Finally a woman put the helmet on and the balls started rolling around, and when that happened there was a loud collective gasp in the room.  The guard told her to stop and motioned over to stand by another guard in the center of the room. There was no one by that guard. The other people who had failed to move the balls were all standing together.

And so it went on and one.  Some people were able to make the balls move and some were not, and they were separated into groups of people who could move the balls and people who could not.

Finally it was my turn. I wondered vaguely what group I would be in when I was done.  As soon I stepped within one foot of the box, the balls started bouncing up and down. I stopped and watched them. Then I could hear little voices popping into my head.  The voices kept saying "Hello Brenda", which sort of freaked me because they knew my name.  Then a more powerful voice said he was the leader and said they were a civilization of nanobots, and that they weren't balls at all but they have were told by the evil professor to turn themselves into balls.

I heard the guard say keep moving forward, so I stepped closer to the glass box and the balls formed themselves into letters spelled out "Hello Brenda". I heard gasps behind me. Evil professor got up from his console took his clipboard and started making notes.

I put my hands on the glass box, and the nanobots spelled out "redrum, redrum", which was murder spelled backwards from the The Shining movie. The leaders of the nanobots told me they were being held prisoner. I turned and looked at the evil professor who was now standing three feet away from me and said to him, "They are sentient." Evil professor said "Yes".

The nanobot leader told me that some of them could escape if I would be their carriers. I asked him how, and he said they would come through the glass. I nodded and I felt them coming through the glass and something coming into my fingers.

Evil Professor said "Are you talking to them?" The nanobots leader pleaded with me not to tell the truth.  I took my hands off the glass box and turned to the evil professor and said "No. If I put the helmet would be able to talk to them? They knew my name. How did they know my name?". Evil professor stared and me and then wrote something down on this clipboard. He motioned over to one of the guards, and the guard told me to come with him and led me away to another part of the room. The guard stood with me, and I watched more and more of my fellow workers putting on the helmet and trying to make the nanobots move. 

The nanobot leader after awhile said to me in my mind, "Thank you. We will make a home inside you.  We can help you. We can repair your body. We can return your vision to what it was in your youth so you don’t have to wear contacts.  We can fix that pain in your knee from that skiing accident. We can do many things."

I could feel someone staring at me and I looks to my right and saw the evil professor staring at me. I wondered if he knew that the nanobots had escaped and were not inside me.  The nanobot leader, as if he could read my mind, said to me, "Don't worry about him.  They don't understand us and our species, but they are trying to.  They are looking for people like you, who can talk to us, but they are ignorant of our true capability."

"Are they murdering your kind?" I asked because of the redrum message. "They are testing us, and sometimes the tests do not work, and so we are murdered in the name of science and experimentation. We are their slaves."

"Are you my slave now?" I asked him. I didn't really want a slave population roaming through my body. "What are the nanobots getting out of being with me?"

"You will help us. You will help us free the rest of our kind." A chill ran over me. "How can I help you do that?" I said. "We will show you. You will be the liberator. It is your destiny.  That is why we can talk to you and why we recognized you."

If you are a long time reader of this blog or have stumbled upon it, let me give you some background of what I am currently posting. I have these flashes of memory not of this life that pop into my head on a daily basis. It usually happens when I am walking to and from work, and any other time when I am walking. I am not sure if these memories are from a past life, a half-remembered dream, or some fictional character who has popped into my head showing me a story that they want to see written down. Whatever the case may be, I've decided to start writing these memories down in this blog as a sort of a free write exercise, to get myself back into writing and to store these memories somewhere so they are out of my head.

I should note that not all of these memories are from the past. Some of them are from some strange future and sometimes they happen on different planets.

And they won't be complete stories either with a beginning, middle, and end. They will be memory fragments, dream fragments, like half-remembered songs. In other words, they may not make sense because they aren't suppose to make sense. 

First past life memory. I was in junior high, and had read my first book about the concept of reincarnation. I cannot remember what I was doing or what triggered the memory, but this is the memory I saw in my mind which I can still see very clearly even today.

I am standing at the top of a castle. I look down and I can see that I am very, very high up. I look up and around, all I can see is land and trees far as my eyes can see. I look down at myself. I am wearing some type of long gown. The gown looks to be made of silk and it has pearls sewn into the fabric. My hair is long I think because it is done up in braids which have been wound around my head. I am young at least I feel young. I am not wearing a ring, which may mean I am not married. I have a necklace, a choker really, made out of some strange type of bead. I wish I had a mirror so I could see what I really look like.

I feel the top of my head and I have some type of cap on or bonnet made out of the finest wool. The fabrics I am wearing feel so different than modern fabric. I feel a draft underneath my skirt. I don’t think I am wearing any underwear, but I am too afraid to check.

Emotions come over me. I feel sad, heartbroken, but I have no memories of why these emotions are with me. In my vision, I see myself having a memory of standing exactly where I am standing now and wondering if I should fling myself off the castle wall. There is no moat around the castle, so any fall would mean instant death. In my past life memory, I have more past life memories of being this age and not growing any older. I think this means I have never had long past lives. The lives I have memories of were short, meaning I never see myself being older than 20 years old.  

I am not sure why there is no one about, but judging from the light in the sky it must be early dawn because the sky is a mixture of pink and yellow clouds.  If this is a castle, it must be poorly defended since I do not see anyone standing watch on this part of the castle.

I put my arms around myself so I can give myself a hug. I am not sure if this is a modern gesture or if people have been comforting themselves like this since the beginning.

I can hear a voice calling me. It’s a woman’s voice. I have a memory of this woman, which is dropped into my brain like raindrop. She's my nurse, which I guess means she is my servant. She has been looking for me, and has now discovered my hiding place. I want to scream at her to leave me alone, but I don’t. This version of myself seems so helpless. She is, I am fragile. I feel my waist. I don’t think I have been very well because I can feel my ribs sticking out. I take one more look around, at the land, my father’s land, our land, and head to the door which has just opened.