I know I haven't been posting much, but I just don't feel like writing in my blog these days. I'm not doing any kind of writing at all, so it's not just my blog. It's been a strange month. It feels like I made a ton of spiritual progress, which has sadly shaken my core beliefs about who I am and what I need to make me happy.

I've had the feeling this month, which I only felt once before in my life, that I don't really know who I am anymore. It is not a very pleasant feeling. I think I would have been more frightened by these feelings, had I not experienced them before. My friend S is convinced that my health has been so poor lately because all these new revelations about myself has shaken my being to such depths, that it has affected my health.

I shall have to write more about this when I've processed it all. I think I am just now processing my break-up with M-Square to where I can talk about it rationally to my friends without inventing a story or making an excuse for what happened.

And I think the universe, just to make it really clear to me that my world is being turned upside down, sent me a clear message today. One of my favorite pastimes is to shop in Victoria's Secret. They are the only underwear stores that I've been able to find that sells decent cotton underwears and bras. So I walk to VC today and I notice that all their cotton bras are gone. The cotton undies are still there, but not the cotton bras. Of course you can still buy them online, but not in the store anymore. Can you tell my world is like seriously changing? It is to me when I can't shop in any Victoria's Secret store anymore.

The world is turning into a plastic polyster nightmare! Even Lands End is giving in to plastic clothes and hardly selling anything 100% cotton or other natural fabrics. It is beyond my comprehension why people would want to wear plastic bags around their body, because that is what you do when you wear polyester. Yes, poly folly does not wrinkle and is easy to take care of, but it also traps smells and is ghastly uncomfortable when it's hot.

I mean, why would any woman want to wear plastic undies and plastic bras unless they like underwear that will stink and make them sweat. So scary! No wonder men complain about certain odors when doing certain intimate acts - it's the chick's undies!