I was at the library today writing. I'm very lucky to have a public library within a short walking distance of where I live. When I was in college, I did all my studying in public libraries. I never studied in the college library, even when I won my own carrel in the lottery. The college library was too distracting; I spent all my time there people watching. The public library in town, on the other hand, was quieter and it had less distractions for me.

Since I was at the library, I even borrowed a book, EM Forester's "A Room with a View." I've never read the book despite the fact, that "A Room with a View" is on my top ten movie list. I was actually thinking, that it might be fun to go on an EM Forester reading binge. I could read everything EM Forester has ever written. I like all the movies that have been adapted from his books, including "Howard's End" and "A Passage to India", so it might be time to actually read his books.

I'm sort of getting into the new diet. Actually, it's the old fashioned diet where you just count your calories. I've never done calorie counting before; some part of me has always rebelled against counting calories. Counting calories seemed so anal, so nazi, so I don't know, way too intense for me. I had friends who had done and told me horror stories about their calorie counting experiences, and their stories put me off. It's amusing to think I've never counted calories before, especially since I've been dieting since I was 13 years old. I think I've tried every other diet on the planet, except for good old fashioned calorie counting. Strange.

I'm finding however, that calorie counting is actually quite fun. I like doing things that I can track and count. Counting and tracking are after all, how I make money in this world and I'm quite good at it too. Counting pages I've written or words I've written is the only way I seem to able to finish any writing project. Doing Nanowrimo last November clued me into this way of working. I was also only able to finish my screenplay, by setting up a schedule of how many pages I had to write each week.

Maybe calorie counting is the only way I'll finally be able to take off this awful weight I gained, when I was having problems with my silly hormones and my thyroid. Those problems are all fixed now, thank god, but the weight is still there. I lost 14 pounds of it last year and kept it off for a year. Now I just have to lose the rest.

Calorie counting is also easy for me since I tend to eat the same foods over and over again. I think what's going to be difficult is when I go to parties and when I go out. On Friday at work, we're having a potluck for someone who is having a baby. Potlucks at work are always calorie laden eatathons for me. I'm also having dinner at a friend's house on Friday, and she'll probably cook. When you have dinner over at a friend's house, especially a friend who never has to watch what her and her husband eat, the food is usually delicious and completely fattening. How will I track my calories at these events?

I've told myself in the past, that it was always okay if I ate like a complete pig at parties. Now I'm not sure if it's okay for me to eat occasionally like a pig anymore. I think this maybe the reason why I've always hated calorie counting.

The dieting gurus say, if you want to avoid pigging out at parties, eat before going. If you eat before going, you'll be too full to eat like a pig when you get to your party. I wonder if I should try this method. I've never done it before. I've had drinks before going to parties, but never food. I mean, the whole point of going to a party with food, is to eat as much of the free food there as is humanly possible. Is this how I've gained weight over the years? Treating parties like eating free for alls, and eating like I've never seen food in my life before, only because the food is free. Silly attitude isn't it? I don't think I'm the only one with this attitude though, if I think about all the holiday office parties I've attended.

I wonder where I got this attitude about free party food came from? It seems like I've always had a thing about free food. Maybe not in grade school, but definitely since then. I'll have to think about my free food thing; it's never crossed my mind to question this attitude before. Interesting.

One of my guilty pleasures in life is reading Craig's List SF Bay Area Missed Connections.

It all started when a friend of mine told met that he found a post about someone wanting to meet him. I told him that he could never be sure that was post was about him. If he answered it, he could be making a total fool out of himself. He said it didn't matter anyway, because the girl who sent it wasn't that cute.

The thought of someone posting on a board, lamenting that they didn't speak some cute person, is romantic to me. Okay, maybe screwily romantic, but romantic nonetheless. I find it intriguing that someone would go out their way to post an add about someone they'd never met, in hopes of meeting them. But people post more than ads about missed connnections on this webpage. There are lists galores, cries for helps, and even erotic stories. Someone was posting very erotic stories a few months ago. To whom these posts were intended, who knows, but they were fun to read.

I even posted myself once, mostly to complain about writing and not having enough time, or some dribble like that. A few people even responded to me, offering advice, sympathy and tips.

So I read Missed Connections daily, secretly hoping someone will post an ad about seeing me and wanting to meet me. I'm not sure I'd ever answer them, but I would greatly appreciate the thought. Or, at least the chance to dream, to wonder if that post is really about me. I'm not a very romantic person; boyfriends have complained about it even. I find most men are way more romantic than I am. It's not that I'm not romantic, I'm just not romantic in an obvious way. If anything, I'm a closet romantic. I'm a little too practical to really be romantic, but I do fantasize and dream like everybody else.

Craig's List Missed Connections is my secret daily dose of fantasy, my escape from reality, a much needed amusement to my day, and sometimes an inspiration for future stories. Romance stories, of course, which of of course I will secretly publish under a different name. I wouldn't want to ruin my image, after all.

Hard at work today. The project, that I've been putting off for a couple of weeks, has to be done. I hate this. The project has been difficult to figure out, only because it involves money. When analyzing clients and how they spend their money, I'm always sure to be very carerful that what I report is absolutely correct, and mistake and audit proof. Clients get very upset if you make a mistake on reporting their spending patterns.

I went to Borders at Stonestown to buy a couple of books on grammar. The grammar thing is bugging me to death, and making me completely paranoid. I'm thinking this is a good thing, even though I hate being paranoid about my writing.

It's warm today outside. Thank god. Yesterday, it was totally freezing. Since I work out in the burbs, I can avoid the dreary foggy weather of San Francisco during the summer. When I get up in the morning, it's foggy. When I get home at night, it's foggy. Not here at work. Here it's sunny and hot and last summer, it even got up to 105 degrees. Much as I love the fog, it is very nice to be in hot weather for the summer.

Okay, that's all. It's back to work. I need to finish this project by Friday.