I am a comfort shoe snob. I went to Union Square to check out Nordstrom and Macys to look for shoes, but only saw f-ugly shoes! They look like silly little torture chambers for unsuspecting women who want to walk with a sway in their hips.

Yes, they're pretty if you like trashy f-ugly shoes but they look so uncomfortable. I don't know. Maybe if I didn't have that stupid problem with my feet a few years ago, I wouldn't be so down on uncomfortble shoes but I did and once you start wearing comfortable shoes you can't go back to uncomfortable ones.

But I don't want just comfortable shoes, I want stylish comfortable shoes with more than a one-inch heel. I hate flat heeled shoes.

Most women who start wearing fashionable stylish shoes in their youth, start only wearing athletic shoes in their old age or ugly Birkenstocks or Dexters or other old lady type shoes. Talk about feeling like you are seriously over the hill and going down the drain in nanosecond whenever you look down at your shoes.

I think it's better to wear comfortable yet stylish shoes with 2 inch heels, so you at least look and feel young.

I should start a list of the things NOT to do to look old.

1) NO SHORT MANNISH HAIR - all women over a certain age have short hair, it's like a disease or epidemic or something. Okay, maybe Annette Benning can get away with it, but if you don't look like Annette Benning or a Hollywood movie star or a Hollywood movie star, forget it. Keep the hair shoulder length or longer. Besides, hello, it's not the 80's anymore and that Dorothy Hamill do went out a really, really long time ago.

2) NO OLD LADY SHOES - another dead give away about your true age, especially those Dexter shoes!

I'm sure there's more for this list, but these are my major pet peeves about women over a certain age. They look so, what is the word, Stepford wifeish, only worse. It's like after you what, turn 40 or old, you get this list on how you're supposed to look, and boy do most women follow it. It's like they cloned the middle aged woman look all over America. It's so frightening. Don't succumb! And if you're not over 40, don't start the look early!

Fight, fight the middle age woman cloning of America!