I saw the opera "La damnation de Faust" by Berlioz on Thursday. I read the review afterwards, 'Faust' triumphs with or without orgy, and agreed with the reviewer that I couldn't hear the singing of the lead playing Faust.

I was up in the cheap seats, in the balcony and thinking, isn't this guy miked up? I've never had that experience before, and it was very annoying. I could hear the choir fine, and the other singers, but not Faust.

Then I felt bad because the last opera I'd seen was Laz Buhrmann's "La Boheme", and a big deal was made about the singers being miked in that production.

Oh well. When I saw "Turandot", I could hear the the prince perfectly, so it was definitely the fault of the opera singer playing Faust.

And yes, there was an S&M San Francisco style orgy going on, and one point a woman in the choir took off her her blouse revealing her black bra. Some guy in the choir also took off his tux shirt, but the choir chick in the black bra got the most attention, especially when she started kissing the woman next to her.

Now there's a way to pack people in to see the opera, especially the men of both persuasions not to mention the young ones, lesbian sex scenes, S&M threesomes, lots of black leather S&M get ups, and men in black leather jock straps with their hairy butts hanging out.

Plus there was that one scene in that men only tavern where two nuns and two priests come out, and then strip their clothes off to reveal themselves as men wearing fake breasts and jock straps (and yes more hairy butts) who then are groped by the men in the tavern.

But the singing was divine, except for that darned lead tenor! And the opera was short; two hours with no break.

There were many references to easter, and at the end children came out with the girls dressed like they were at their first communion and the boys were carrying crosses. It added a nice counter balance to all the sex scenes, I think.

Oh, and did I mention that the girl singer had short hair, which kind of made her look like a young boy, if you know what I mean. Or maybe she was supposed to have that Julie Andrews nun look from "The Sound of Music".

It was all very questionable, I think. But then this is San Francisco and you're going to have to play to all types of desires I think. A young boy, a young girl, what does it matter, because in the end Faust goes to hell and the young boy/girl, led astray by desire, is redeemed.

Subject: Fw: [SRL] quick before they take it down..

Go to http://www.google.co.uk

then type: weapons of mass destruction

Don't press Search!!

Next click the "I'm feeling lucky" button - read the

error message and read the page error page . .

This is probably really old and I know I've seen it before, but I found it on a site about Kauai and I still think it's very funny.

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during system initialization, where it monitors all other
system activity. Applications such as Pokernight 10.3, Drunken Boys Night 2.5 and Saturday Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected.

I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run some of my other favorite applications. I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but un-install does not work on this program.

Can you help me, please!!!

Thanks, Joe
=================================
Dear Joe:

This is a very common problem men complain about but is mostly due to a primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that life 1.0 is merely a "UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT" program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator to run everything. It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating files within your system would cause Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0,
so nothing is gained.

It is impossible to un-install, delete, or purge the program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this. Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than the original system.

Look in your manual under "Warnings-Alimony/Child Support." I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation. Having Wife 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of their cause.

The best course of action will be to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE. In any case avoid excessive use of the "Esc" key because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the operating system will return to normal. The system will run smoothly as long as you take the blame for all the GPFs. Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high maintenance.

Consider buying additional software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Chocolates 4.0. Do not, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.6. This is not a supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck.

Tech Support.

One of the things I do miss about home is the hourly "Surf Report". How can you live without knowing what the waves are doing?

Here's a fun surfing site I check out when I feel homesick and need to see some wave action; Surfline.

I love the cam shots of waves all over the world! Note to self: check out all the surfing stores to buy 1) surfing dvds and videos and 2) long sleeve surfing brand t-shirts with writing on the sleeves. I love long sleeve t-shirts with designs and/or writing on the sleeves.