In "Bridget Jones Diary", she kept a log of how many alcohol units she drank. I want to keep track of how many red-headed guys I see every day.

Red-headed guy count - 4

So the red-haired marina frat boy finally called back today. I actually had totally written him off today, and was happy that the whole bizarre episode was over. I was even looking forward to going out for drinks with a friend, and checking out the SF nightlife for more beautiful red-head boys since I see them constantly now. But now I guess the game is still on. We might even meet for breakfast tomorrow in Berkeley, although in his words "we should take it one day at a time", because he's got a crazier work schedule than I do.

He is such a Steve clone, only worse. Steve never had that kind of travel schedule. Googled Steve, the one that got away, last night and he's designing sports games for cellphones on the peninsula somewhere. God, I'd love to hook up with him again to see if our timing is any better this time around. I'm sure the guy is married, because he was really looking to do that when I met him.

And now I'm just mooning over Steve look-alikes and clones, that aren't as nice, are worse workaholics, and don't have his communication skills. No, I take that back. Scott was the worse workaholic I dated, because he started and was CEO of his own company and worked seven days a week. But at least Scott too had good communication skills. We emailed alot, chatted on line every day, and talked on the phone at least once a day, and he had a pet name for me within a week.

But the game is on, and although my conscience keeps putting up the red flags and telling me this isn't a good thing, my mind is made up and I'm bagging the boy one way or another, one of these days, when his schedule permits us that is.

Okay, now that we're talking about signs. How's this for an odd sign?

On Wednesday of last week when I was at the height of my lust in the dust crush on the red-headed marina frat boy, I saw 12 guys after work who had red hair. There I was sitting in Starfreaks across from the Embarcardero Hyatt Regency and trying to edit my screenplay when I saw 7 of them, count that 7 red-headed guys on the way into the place and for the 1.5 hours I sat there. Then at the gym and on the way home, I saw another 5 red-heads.

Who knew there were so many strawberry blondie boys in San Francisco? I couldn't believe it, so I started keeping track. I mean, I keep track of my things since I have thing for red-heads, and I'm telling you I never maybe see more than one a day. So 12 in a day is like weird, very, very weird.

But what this 12 red-head sighting is a sign of, I have no idea. Does that mean the guy was thinking of me or does it mean God was telling me there's more of him in my life so don't freak out, worry and fret. Who knows?

It feels really strange to think that my emotions can turn on a dime. I was in serious crush mode with the red-haired marina frat boy last week, and now it feels like it never happened and I’m on to the next thing. This turnabout of emotions makes me feel shallow and vapid, but perhaps it is the nature of lustful crushes rather than a personal failing on my part.

A woman who got into the elevator this afternoon with me at work, was so excited because she said that an elevator had never ever appeared for her just as she was coming out of the door. "When everything in your life works for once, it’s a good sign," she said, "And I just bought a lottery ticket too." I smiled and then I asked her, "What if everything is going wrong?" She laughed and said "Then that’s a bad sign".

So is this a good sign? On the way into work this morning on MUNI, I was sitting there reading the introduction to John Steinbeck’s "The Red Pony" and smiling to myself about this great line which read, "… both sustained a disillusioned view of the present by retreating into an invented past, where they could indulge in their romanticism unchecked by the considerations of verisimilitude." God, I love this line! Don’t you? I think this is how I like to write or would love to write. Who cares about writing in conjunction with reality when you can write and live in your own invented world?

Anyway, I just happen to look up and there was some cute guy staring at me across the car. He smiled at me and then I smiled back. But then as is usual for me, I didn’t think anything about it and went back to what I was doing which was copying the quote into my journal. But as I was copying the quote, I started thinking that I should really like smile more and give him, what red-haired marina frat boy called "my high wattage smile." But I was shy, and didn’t really do anything except glance up at him from time to time.

Then when he got off at Montgomery, I looked up at him and he smiled and I smiled back and then he was gone. Maybe my next fantasy is get chatted up on Muni. It’s never happened to me before, although it’s something I’ve always dreamed about. I just have to figure out how to get a guy to go from smiling to actually talking to me, and maybe my "high wattage like sunshine smile" is the way to go.