Thank you for viewing / reading my blog posts! I appreciate it!

Tuesday, January 27, 2004

I don't consider myself a romantic. I rarely cry at movies, but this movie just made me ball. It's an Australian film called Innocence.

I saw the trailer for it while watching another video, and I decided to rent it. I loved the premise of the movie, which is about rekindling your first love after 40 years. I have a thing about my first love so I had to see it.

I was in tears the whole time. It made me wonder what it would be like to see my first love again after 40 years. Would the guy still even remember me? He was my first love, but who knows where I ranked in his life.

It makes me teary eyed to think about rekindling a first love. Is it possible to start again, start all over? Can you pick up where you left off 40 years ago?

I've tried to answer this question myself, and tried to write a play about running into my first love. The play was hard to write, so I didn't finish it. I wanted my characters to have a happy ending, but I couldn't do it.

It made me wonder if I believed in second chances in life. I don't think I do. Once an opportunity is gone, it's gone forever and you can never get it back, not in the same way anyway. The play started to be about how there are no second chances in life, and even if there were, my characters wouldn't choose them. What couldn't work in the past can't work in the present. The thought depressed me so I stopped working on the play.

Watching the movie made me want to work on the play again. Maybe my characters can't have the happy ending they've always wanted, but maybe they can have happy moments. And perhaps a few happy moments are better than no moments at all right? I hope so.

No comments: