I went to Stonestown to write. Why I can write in the middle of a mall in food court, where people are talking and eating and they're blaring god awful music and not in the quiet of my own place where I can play my own music, is a mystery to me right now. But writing in very public loud places seems to be the only way I can write this month.

I interviewed the brother character Michael in my screenplay. After finishing up the interview, I decided to change the title of my screenplay to "Going Home Again". I looked up the word "going" in imdb.com and I couldn't find this title in their movie list.

My reviewers told me that I needed my title and I was opposed to it, but now I think they were right. My story is about a a guy going home again and I have him say "some people say the hardest part of leaving home is actually leaving. I think the hardest part of leaving home is going back home again."

On the way home, I also realized that this is my second story about failure. Art is Scary was about the fear of failure, or so says my acting director. I disagreed with him at the time, but maybe he was right. I had a fantasy of Roger Ebert talking about my screenplay and saying that "it was filled with pathos and a sense of failure, failure of parenting, failure of finding your dreams, failure of a father, failure of a son, failure of the american family and finally failure of american society."

And what do I have my movie family saved by? Baseball. How ironic since there may well be a baseball strike this year. I'm not sure what I am trying to say about society and baseball, but I guess I must be saying something.

I hate that I seem to only write about failure. I hate failure. I used to think that failure was not an option in my life, but I have had so many failures that I have proved myself wrong over the years. I love all the many ways people fail and that I've failed. And failure is sometimes accidental, sometimes driven by fate, and sometimes completely voluntary. Is it any wonder I am obsessed with failure as a theme in my writing?